Turn On Me
by NotesandPhotographs
Summary: AU IK When she walked away four years ago, breaking both their hearts, she thought she'd never see him again. But, through chance, he wandered back into her life and Kagome Higurashi is finding it harder to stay away from Inuyasha Azuma than she thought.
1. Prologue

Turn On Me  
By Notes-and-Photographs

Prologue

Family. Since birth, it had been instilled in my being that it was the only thing that mattered. Without family, you were nothing. You must always forgive, must always obey, and always, _always_ respect your elders. Friends, boyfriends, lovers, neighbors, and random people on the street: all these were ephemeral. Your family was not. It was something you could never be rid of and something you should never want to be rid of. At the end of the day, family was the people you could always go back to. Admittedly, this was a good philosophy to live by. It inculcated a sense of morality and values into the young that was rarely seen these days. When used properly, it allowed a family unit to be closer than ever.

It was primarily my father that impressed these virtues upon me. And until I was twenty, I never dreamed that I would be forced to choose between my beliefs and not only my happiness, but the happiness of another. It was unfortunate that, at that time, I had not been freed from the grips of these ridiculously drastic familial rules. When my father had been alive, they had made sense. They weren't vicious and cruel. They never would have deprived me of what mattered to me more than anything else in the world: love. But after his death, the dynastic values that had been propagandized in him from his youth from his father, and his father before that, fell to pieces. They turned into instruments of control, when considered at all. My father was the glue that held us together. I can clearly remember when I enjoyed spending time with my family and I can safely say that it was at least ten years ago. Now, I didn't even recognize my mother, my elder sister, my aunt. The death of my father had changed them permanently, had changed the way they treated me forever.

It is even more unfortunate that, while I had not been freed from the grips of these twisted rules, at the time that they affected me most, I had no desire to be free. In my mind, I would do anything, _anything_, to make things go back to the way they used to be. But you can't change the past; I know that now. You can only learn from it, and hope that you don't make the same mistake twice. And I assure you, I haven't.

Inuyasha Azuma. Or, as he is referred to by my family, "the mistake"; an aberration, if you will. Let me tell you, it didn't start that way. The first day I met Inuyasha, I thought him a crass, brash, hooligan unworthy of my attention. He thought me a stuck up, snobby, goody two-shoes. These, and other similar descriptions, were passed back and forth between us. Stick us in a room together and one of us would end up dead. It remained this way for three out of our four years at S— University. And even though we disliked each other, we couldn't stay away. I was an English major and he was a music major. You would think that our paths would cross rarely, if at all, but he was everywhere I went, no matter how hard I tried to avoid him, and I'm sure it wasn't purposeful. At least, in the beginning.

In our senior year, everything changed. I don't quite know what it was that changed; was it me, was it him, was it just the way things were meant to be? But they did change. The sight of him no longer made me want to scream. I suppose that, perhaps, after three years, we were just tired of arguing, of giving our friends headaches, of ruining fun evenings. We just didn't talk to each other. And then, in October, he asked me out. I was intrigued and I said yes. From then on, everything seemed to click. We were only together eight months, but I felt more in those eight months than I would ever feel again. Our romance may not have been long, but it was true. I loved Inuyasha Azuma then and I still love him now. Nothing will ever change that fact.

A week before graduation, in the interim between when classes end and graduation, he asked me to marry him. I said yes. A week later, at graduation, I said no. My family would never hear of it. Inuyasha was a brilliant musician, but he had no direction, no career, and, most importantly, no money. My aunt, my father's sister and my trusted confidant, forbade me from marrying the boy. I obeyed, reluctantly, and walked away. Overnight, I became a different person. I never considered myself to be very pretty, but when I was dating Inuyasha, I felt radiant all the time. Now that he was gone, I felt washed out and solemn. My aunt, once my closest friend, became a distant relative. Deep down, I could never forgive her.

But family was all that mattered. And without them, I was nothing. But, as I've come to realize four years later, without Inuyasha, without love, I'm less than nothing.

* * *

A/N: I know what you're thinking: Why in the world is this chick starting yet another story when she hasn't finished TCW yet?! I've asked myself the same thing. And the only answer I have for you is that I'm tired of TCW and have no motivation for it. So rather than just slap something together, I'm gonna wait it out and then come back and finish it the right way.

So anyways, new story. An Inuyasha _Persuasion_, if you haven't already picked that up. I finished the book a couple weeks ago and the plot bunnies have been driving me mad since then. And I finally gave in. It's short, but it's a prologue. Chapters will get longer. How fast I update will depend on the response. I have no set schedule for it, as of yet.

Lemme know what you think! Hit the review button!

Emily

NaP


	2. 1:I Don't Want To Get Over You

Turn On Me

Chapter 1-I Don't Want To Get Over You

_I could listen to all my friends  
and go out again__ and pretend it's enough,__  
I could make a career of being blue...  
But I don't want to get over you.  
_I Don't Want To Get Over You by The Magnetic Fields

"And so I was relaxing in the on call room after this ten hour surgery that saved this kid's life when this crazy old lady wanders in, not knowing where she is…" I nodded, a fake smile plastered on my face to indicate that I was listening. Really, I was fixed on the piece of spinach stuck between his two front teeth. It was so…distracting. Not that the distraction wasn't unwelcome. It certainly beat listening to this man talk about his heroic, life saving adventures as Doctor Boring. I'm surprised that he hasn't bored one of his dates to death with his ridiculous, self-aggrandizing stories. But Suikotsu the Bore just kept right on talking "And so, she starts screaming, thinking that I'm her son who died in World War II and then she faints…"

Mmm, that's right. I'm on a date. Trust me; I'm as unenthused as the next person to be out and about with this guy. I mean, he wasn't bad to look at. Really, he was kind of cute, in a dorky way, when his mouth wasn't running. But Dr. Suikotsu Bores-me-to-death hadn't stopped talking since we entered the restaurant. I'm sure that, by now, you've assumed that not only do I not like Suikotsu, but I'd rather stab myself with a salad fork so that he would stop talking and take me to the hospital to get stitches. "But then she started to seize and I knew that I had to step in and solve this mystery…" That's right folks. This guy fancies himself the next Dr. Greg House.

"Uh huh!" I nodded, trying to appear enthusiastic. Quickly, I picked up my glass of red wine and downed what was left of it. "I'd hate to interrupt, but I need to go to the powder room. I'll be right back."

"Oh, okay!" He looked shocked that I had actually interrupted him. Clearly, nothing could be more riveting than his rescuing a defenseless, old woman. Surely, my need for the bathroom could wait. But too the ladies' room I did walk, my black pumps clicking on the tile floor as I entered. I placed my black clutch purse beside the sink and set about washing my hands. Opting to use the air drying instead of paper towels—not for any environmental reason, mind you. It just took longer—I dried my hands and then walked back to the mirror. I reapplied my lipstick and put on a little more powder before I reached into my bag and pulled out my phone. I rolled my eyes. I had been in here less than five minutes. I took a step back and took a look at myself in the mirror. I was wearing a black dress and, along with my black shoes and black purse, I was dressed more appropriately for a funeral than a date. But that was fine with me. We wouldn't want Dr. Suikotsu the Dull to get the wrong idea. To be honest, I didn't want anyone to get the wrong idea. I wasn't interested in dating. Four years is a long time, but I still wasn't over Inuyasha and I don't believe I ever will be.

Hopping up next to the sink, I slid back towards the mirror and leaned against it. I flipped open my phone and dialed quickly, placing the phone to my ear.

"Hello?" a feminine voice answered and I smiled. Just who I was hoping for.

"Would it be rude if I escaped through the back and ditched Suikotsu?"

"What?" was her shocked response.

"Sango, the man is a total pain. Please, don't make me go back out there." Sango was my youngest sister, only a year younger than me. We had only become close in the last few years. Growing up, I had always tagged along with Kikyo, our elder sister, and then, after Dad died, I clung to my aunt. It was only after Inuyasha did I finally come to appreciate her. She was caring, kind, determined, loyal and a slight bit wacky. She knew me better than I knew myself sometimes.

"Kagome, I know you may not like the guy, but the least he deserves is for you to at least make it through the end of the date before you judge him. He may be nervous. I'm sure, given some time, you'll warm up to him," she tried to reason with me. Oh Sango, ever the logical one.

"Sango, for the past hour and a half, all I've done is listen to him boast about how he saves lives for a living. Like that somehow makes him superior to the rest of us." I replied, annoyed that she would try to make Suikotsu out better than he happened to be in real life. Sango sighed.

"He's that bad, huh?" She asked, defeated.

"The worst," I responded with disdain.

"Well, if you had just gotten together with all the nice guys I set you up with, then I wouldn't have to resort to giving out your number to random men I met in the supermarket checkout line." Yeah, Sango is the one responsible for not only this disastrous date, but for countless others the past for years. Sango is nothing if not determined to repay you for any kindness you happen to bestow upon her. In fact, she brings new meaning to the phrase "no good deed goes unpunished." You see, right after I graduated, I was hanging out with Sango when I bumped into an old boyfriend. His sisters, Eri and Ayume, and I had been in the same class and friendly with each other. Miroku had gone to a special private school for the arts—he was an exceptionally talented painter—and after I had been at his house for a slumber party with the girls and our other friend, Yuka, we met and hooked up for a little while. It was nothing too serious. I was sixteen and he was seventeen; at that point our hormones were running wild and needed an outlet. We were together six months before we both decided that we were better off as friends. But when I bumped into him all those years later, in a Starbucks of all places, he and Sango had hit it off. Needless to say, a year and a half later, wedding bells were ringing. It is this coincidental piece of fate that has cause my lovely sister to try and find me a "new Miroku." I know that she means well—she just wants me to be as happy as she is—but at this point, I've had my fair share of failed first dates. There were never seconds.

"Wait," I asked, "random guys in the supermarket?"

"Well…" she hesitated, "I was shopping the other day and he happened to be in front of me in line. The place was packed and I was waiting at least a half an hour, so I got a chance to talk to him. He seemed nice, so I mentioned I had a wonderful, beautiful, single, older sister and gave him your number so he could set something up."

"You set me up with a guy you knew all of thirty minutes?!" I inquired, shocked and outraged. I suppose this is what I get for not saying "no" to my little sister. "For all you know, he could be a serial killer or a creepy stalker!"

"Geez, I'm sorry. If you had only just hooked up with one of my better guy friends—" she snapped back, but stopped herself. "Okay. I promise that I won't set you up anymore. It seems to me that my efforts are going unappreciated."

"Sango," I pleaded, hoping she wasn't mad at me, "I never asked for this. Don't worry, I'll find a nice guy eventually," Ha! Fat chance, "and then we'll look back on this and laugh."

"I know," she conceded.

"Now," I chimed in, enthusiastically, "what are we going to do about Suikotsu the Boasting Pest?" I could tell that she was rolling her eyes at me.

"You should go back out there, have some dessert then part ways like _polite society_ says you should before he thinks you fell into the toilet or something," she lectured. I chuckled.

"Aw, you're no fun," I cajoled.

"Goodbye Kagome," Sango replied exasperatedly.

"Love you too sis!" She hung up and I flipped my phone closed with a sigh. I slid off the countertop and walked out of the ladies' room. Suikotsu the Bore, you better be prepared, because here I come!

* * *

Dinner at my family's house on Sunday night has been a tradition long upheld before my birth. The rule is, if you don't have another pressing social engagement (that is, you are either at the Academy Awards or have lost an arm and are in the ER) and you don't live an unreasonable distance of away (more than two hours), then you must attend, no ifs, ands, or buts. This is why, at the age of twenty five, I was going to my childhood home to eat an uncomfortable meal and be reduced to feeling like I was seven.

The dining room spared no expense at making me increasingly uncomfortable. The long table, which my mother not sat at the head of, was treated with a dark finish. It looked almost black, and, when you're sitting at the other end of it, it has a habit of making you feel small and insignificant under the critical gaze of your elders. The walls are painted a deep forest green and the chandelier was never brightened too much. My mother felt that bright light was too harsh for her and made her look old. The china was passed down from one generation to the next since the 18th century. It was very pretty and very expensive. The silverware too, was a family heirloom. The chairs were wooden and stained to match the table. They also happened to be the single most uncomfortable chair that you would ever sit on.

My mother always made a seating chart for any occasion, these Sunday night dinners included. In fact, the layout has been the same for so long, no one has to think about it anymore. Next to my mother, on her left, sits her boy toy of the week. There have been so many that I don't bother asking for their names anymore. They're gone before there is a need for me to remember.

On her right sits the reigning matriarch of the Higurashi family. Dr. Kimi Higurashi, or Auntie Kim, as I refer to her. Auntie is by no means a dumb, trophy wife. She was raised rich, yes, but she always used that to gain every opportunity she ever needed. Auntie has a PhD in psychology and when she's working on her third book, she's a guest lecturer at the state university. When she married Taji Matsumoto at the age of twenty seven, she refused to change her name. While Matsumoto had good standing in society, in my Aunt's opinion, nothing could be better than being a Higurashi. It opened doors that were closed and locked to the rest of the world. My uncle passed away when I was very young—too young to remember if my aunt ever truly cared about him. I sincerely doubt she did, though; the only man she was ever pleased with was my father. Taji Matsumoto was just what was expected of her. Is it any wonder that she disapproved of Inuyasha, a "penniless musician" with "no chance of success?" I know she appear harsh, but she really thinks that she's doing what's best for me. She cares too much because she knows my sisters will never amount to much. Kikyo is too much like my mother, whom she despises, and while she is easier on Sango, her hopes are dreams are pinned on me. She tells me every time I see her how much I remind her of her brother—my father. She has placed me on a pedestal my whole life. I used to revel in the attention—after all, I got none from my mother or sisters growing up—but that was back when I was naïve enough to believe that I could live up to her expectations. Now I've pretty much resigned myself to never being good enough for Auntie Kim. That doesn't stop her from thinking that things will eventually turn around for me; as if, overnight, I would transform into someone with a successful job, a steady, rich boyfriend and a gorgeous house, large enough to raise children in.

Diagonally across from Auntie Kim is my sister Kikyo, who perpetually looks like she has a stick up her butt. We've never gotten along, even though I followed her around like a lost puppy growing up. She's cold and disassociated with everyone but her friend Kagura. Granted, I can understand why she's like that. My mother, like Auntie Kim did with me, pinned all her expectations on Kikyo. She was supposed to be married with children now. I'm sure that when Sango got married first, she felt nothing but envy. After all, it was supposed to be her. Next to her always sat Kagura. Kagura Yamada has been friends with my sister since high school and she was around so much that she was practically family. Of course that doesn't say much, as the majority of my family and I don't get along very well. This includes Kagura. Sango and Miroku sat next to my aunt and, bringing up the rear, I sat next to Kagura.

These dinners were painful to get through most weeks. It was formulaic at this point. We'd sit down for dinner and my mother would start a banal conversation with her boyfriend. Auntie Kim would interject, change the subject, and find a way to include something she would want to discuss with me. I would answer politely, but my opinion would be overshadowed quickly as my mother would regain control of the conversation again. She would direct the attention to Kikyo, suggest a man for her to go out with and then marry, to which Kikyo would vehemently protests to. This would cause an argument between the two, which usually escalated to some yelling before boyfriend would pretend to be all macho and would step in, trying to diffuse the situation and impress mother. However, this would just serve to piss her off and then they would start arguing, culminating with boy toy being thrown out. Kagura would never say a word during all of this, just eat in silence. Auntie Kim would, eventually, ignore it all with distaste and engage me, Sango, and, when it suited her, Miroku in conversation. Soon enough, the evening would end and I'd be on my way home. It wasn't a wonderful experience, but I was used to it; I was almost comforted by it.

But when I entered tonight, I knew that something was up and that I wasn't going to like it. For starters, my mother had no man accompanying her. That alone was enough to make me suspicious. But to make matters worse, Kikyo and Kagura were sharing conspiratorial views and secret smiles. I could easily put this down to both of them coming out and acknowledging that they were lesbians, but combined with my mother, who was avoiding both my own and Auntie Kim's eyes, I knew that something terrible was about to happen. Before the meal was served, my mother stood up and cleared her throat. I shot a look at Sango, who was usually more in the loop than I was, but she just shrugged.

"I have an announcement to me," she declared. Auntie Kim's jaw dropped and she gasped,

"Oh god, you're pregnant!" My mother had the decency to blush, though, from embarrassment or rage I'll never be sure.

"No," She stated firmly and primly, clearly offended. "I most certainly am not."

"Well?" Auntie questioned, a triumphant smile on her face at having humiliated my mother, "Out with it already."

"I'm moving!" She announced, a huge smile on her face. My face drained of color.

"To where?" I croaked out.

"To the beach. This house is far too big for me." Although, we both knew that she was going to purchase a house of equal, if not grander size.

"And the house?" My aunt cut it.

"I'm going to find some renters, at least for the summer. Kikyo and Kagura will be coming down to help me look and get settled in. I'm sure I'll come back eventually, but who knows. I think that I need a change of scenery."

"Just as long as you're not selling the place, Kaori, then I don't care what you do. This is the ancestral home of the Higurashis. I would be most disappointed to have to take legal action against you." Ha! You'd relish every minute of it.

"I would never sell this place!" My mother replied haughtily.

"Well the, I'll have my solicitor"—yes, Auntie K was the kind of 'posh' woman who still said solicitor—"get to work on finding prospective tenants for you," she added coolly.

"Oh you would?" My mother asked eagerly. It was clear that she was hoping that Aunt Kimi would deal with the paperwork. "That's so nice of you Kimi. But tell him to be very selective. I can't bare the thought of just _anyone_ having the place. Oh! I know. They should be a lovely, young, married couple. Newlyweds! Doesn't that just sound perfect?" We all nodded politely. "Well then, as it's the alst dinner we'll have until I'm settled down the shore, let's eat!" she commanded.

"Kaori, I have a suggestion," Auntie Kim spoke just as the food began to be served.

"Oh?" my mother's voice was filled with trepidation. Aunt Kimi's suggestions almost always never worked out in her favor, but there was nothing she could do to object to them.

"Well, as you know, I have a beach house that I won't be using for a few more weeks. Why don't we put these dinners on hold until then. I'll bring the girls down with me and we'll have a party celebrating our reunion." At the word party, my mother's eyes lit up.

"Oh! Wonderful!" She glanced over at Kikyo and Kagura, both of whom nodded their approval. It was settled. Both my own and Sango's opinion didn't matter. We shared a wry glance and a sarcastic smirk before we ate our meals with a relatively calm air about us.

* * *

On the way home, a smile stretched over my face. Six whole weeks without my dreadful family dinners. Nothing, _nothing_, could have made the evening better. It didn't matter that strangers would be living in the house I grew up in. While I was sentimentally attached to some of the rooms, I hadn't lived there since I graduated. It would be weird, yes, when I went to go visit Sango who lived in the same neighborhood, to see someone else living in our house, but eventually, I'd get over it. Besides, it wasn't like it was forever.

In celebration, I had the windows down, the breeze blowing through my air, the radio turned up, and I sang along to some inane pop song. Things were better than they had been in a long time. While I had no significant other—and no prospects, for that matter—I had friends. I had Sango and Miroku and Eri and Ayume, who I didn't see quite as often, and while a little bit frivolous, were fairly good company. I had my own apartment and a job, both of which were things that many people didn't have. And without these dinners, I was a little less stressed. All of this should have been my first indicator that things were about to turn south and quickly.

"'_This is 103.7 WECT, I'm Ace Tamada here with Inuyasha Azuma, rising independent rock star. Hey Inuyasha, how are you tonight?'_

'_I'm pretty good, Ace. It really doesn't get better than having your first single debut on the radio.'" _I slammed on the brakes and swerved over to the side of the road, my brakes screeching in protest at the sudden stop. The sound of his voice, even after so long, was like being punched in the gut.

"'_True that. For those of you living in a cave, Azuma's new hit "Worth It" off is new album _Train Wreck_ is premiering tonight only on 103.7. Now, I've got to say, Inuyasha, you're a big hit among the ladies.'" _He laughed at this. _"So what they want to know is whether or not you have a girlfriend.'_

'_Nah, not right now. I had my heart broken a few years back, really bad. Smashed to pieces really. Turned out to be a good thing. I mean, not only did it free me from a heartless harpy, it gave me some great material for my music. But right now, I'm just playing the field. Should someone special happen to come along, that'd be great, but I wouldn't count on it.'_

'_You hear that ladies? The man is single and looking! Well, I've got loads of listener questions for you, and I promise everyone out there, you'll get your answers. But, first things first. This really has promise to be the smash hit of the summer. For everyone waiting out there, with bated breath, here's "Worth It" by Inuyasha Azuma._" The song began to play and I leaned back in my seat, my eyes welling up with tears. I took a few deep breaths and allowed myself to calm down. I would not cry over this. I was past this point. It was four years ago; I shouldn't be this affected by just his voice. Freaking out wasn't going to allow me to go back in time and change things.

I listened to song and the rest of the interview before I flicked it off and drove the rest of the way home in silence.

* * *

A/N: Chapter 1 is officially here! I got quite a bit of positive feedback, particularly alerts and favorites. Thanks to the few that reviewed. I know this chapter threw a lot of information at you, but it was necessary to set up for the rest of the plot. Note also, that 103.7 WECT is made up and not a real radio station in anyway (ECT are my initials haha).

That's all for now. REVIEW people! I wanna hear what you think! Next chapter will include a few new characters, a couple of whom I've already mentioned and two that I haven't. And Inuyasha is not far off!!

Emily  
NaP


	3. 2:Miniature Disasters

Turn On Me

Chapter 2-Miniature Disasters

_Miniature disasters and minor catastrophes,  
Bring me to my knees.  
Well I must be my own master,  
Or a miniature disaster will be,  
Will be the death of me._

Miniature Disasters by KT Tunstall

_It was the end of September and, after a few weeks of nonstop work, my friends and I blew off some steam and went out to see a movie. On our way back to campus, we stopped into the local coffee house, Friendly Grounds, for a quick pick me up before we went back to work and back to the stack of homework that was still unfinished. To our surprise, the place was packed; we could barely get in the door. Music filled my ears and while I was waiting in line, I stood on my tippy toes to try and peer around people's heads to see who was playing. It was obvious what he was the one that brought in the crowd._

"_What are you doing?" my friend asked to my odd behavior, with a quiet hiss. I shrugged off her judgment._

"_I'm trying to see whose show case this is. The voice sounds so familiar, but I just can't place it." She rolled her eyes at me._

"_You'll be able to see when we get closer. C'mon, the line's moving." Suki dragged me by the arm to the counter so we could place our order. I frowned in annoyance, before I asked for a mocha and waited impatiently to try and get closer. The music was beautiful, acoustic, and light. It was the kind of thing I'd listen to while studying or just hanging around. The man had me hooked and I hadn't been able to see who it was. Finally our drink orders arrived and we made our way through the crowd to the table that Mimi had swooped in and grabbed for us and sat down. Once I settled in, I turned my head towards the small stage they had set up to finally see the musician playing. I gasped and my eyes widened as I saw Inuyasha playing quietly, a smile on his face and a twinkle in his eye that I had never seen before. Admittedly, I had not seen Inuyasha look very happy; our encounters always ended in yelling and name calling. Seeing him so content on the stage, performing unnerved me slightly. This was not the Inuyasha Azuma I knew. He continued to sing, to draw me in to his world. As I watched and listened, everything else faded away. My girlfriends' conversation, the applause form the people gathered around, the buzzes and whirrs of the coffee machines all disappeared into the background. All that mattered was Inuyasha. If only I had known that what I was beginning to feel would continue to grow from there and never stop. Soon enough, my friends left. I waved them off, still in a daze and stayed until his show case had finished. With the end of the music, I jolted out of my state and looked around. Most people had left or were on their way out. Inuyasha was packing up._

_I wasn't really sure why I stood up and made my way over to my "arch-nemesis" instead of just leaving, but I was on my feet and getting closer before I could stop myself. "Hi," I spoke. The minute that syllable left my mouth, I wanted to take it back. What was I _doing_? His eyes casually glanced over to me and his mouth turned down lightly somewhere between a grimace and a frown. _

"_Oh, it's you. What do you want wench? I really don't feel like arguing with you tonight." I bristled slightly at the wench comment, but I held my tongue. Truth was, I didn't feel like arguing either._

"_I just wanted to say…well…I was listening…and…I guess I just wanted to say that you're very talented and…I enjoyed listening to you play." Inuyasha's eyebrows shot up in skepticism and he eyed me suspiciously._

"_Was that a compliment, Higurashi?" I smiled at him._

"_Yes, yes it was. Don't spread it around though; people might think I'm insane." His 'frownace' disappeared._

"_That's what I'm starting to think," he replied and I giggled._

"_Yeah, I guess this is a little out of character for me."_

"_You got that right," he commented. Awkward silence overtook us and I prayed for the earth to open wide and swallow me up. I didn't know what to do, what to say, if I even _wanted_ to say anything. I could get out right now. It would be easy; all I had to do was say 'nice to see you' and be on my merry way. That was the safe thing to do and it seemed to be my best option._

"_So how's the semester treating you?" I asked, surprising myself. What happened to my plan to get out nice and easy? What was I doing?! I had the perfect opportunity to get out fo this mess and not only did I _not_ take it, but I dug myself further in._

"_It's been alright. It's only been a few weeks though, it's bound to get harder."_

"_I know what you mean," I commiserated. "I don't even want to have to think about doing my thesis yet."_

"_Ugh, don't remind me." He stated with a groan. I glance at my watch, and my eyes went wide with the time._

"_Oh wow, I didn't realize it was so late."_

"_Yeah," he responded. I really had lost track of time. There was no way that I was going to finish my work tonight. I sighed, accepting this fact before bidding Inuyasha farewell._

"_Well, it was nice talking to you, Azuma. I'm sure I'll see you around campus." I smiled at the thought, although my head was sending off alarm bells._

"_Yeah, sure, see ya Higurashi." I turned on my heel and with a little wave, I exited the coffee shop, my emotions a jumbled mess. At least I knew what I was going to do with the rest of the night; sort it all out._

* * *

"Kagome? Kagome darling? Kagoooomeeee? KAGOME!" I jolted back to life from my little nap. I hadn't slept well the night before; I had too much on my mind. So instead of working, like I should have been, I had close my eyes for a power nap through lunch. I had hoped that no one would notice, but my coworker, Jakotsu, had returned, and to make sure that I didn't get fired and just screamed in my ear. I blinked a couple times, now awake and offered Jakotsu a weary smile. He tossed me a sandwich which I clumsily caught. "You've been asleep an hour. Please tell me that you're so tired because you had wild, hot, passionate sex all night with a male model." I laughed quietly and unwrapped the sandwich.

"I'm sorry to disappoint you, Jak, but we both know that it's not going to happen. To either of us." I added, taking a bite. I frowned; ham and cheese. Not my favorite, but it would do. It certainly beat not eating. Jakotsu laughed.

"Speak for yourself, honey." The phone rang and I jumped. I ignored it for a second, turning back to my friend.

"Thanks for the sandwich, Jak. I don't know what I'd do without you." He smiled widely at me.

"Well, yes, I don't want to see you fired." I shrugged.

"I'll be fine. Myouga won't fire me. He's too nice."

"Well, you never know. Especially in this economy." He responded. "After all, Myouga might want a secretary that actually answers the phone." I glared and threw a pen at him. He laughed and walked down the hall to his cubicle. I rolled my eyes and picked up the phone.

"Tokugawa Publishing," I answered, politely.

"Finally, Kagome! I've been calling for ten minutes. I was starting to get worried," Sango's voice came through the phone.

"You could have just left a message," I advised her.

"But this is important!" She objected. I frowned, worried.

"What happened? Are you okay? Is Miroku okay?" She laughed at me.

"We're all fine," she responded, lightly.

"Well then, it can wait a few minutes for me to finish my lunch." I took another bite.

"It can't! The house has been rented!" she blurted out. I nearly choked. Swallowing hurriedly, I croaked out,

"What? Already?"

"I know!"

"It hasn't even been twenty four hours," I exclaimed.

"You know how Aunt Kimi's lawyers are. What Auntie wants, she gets within twelve hours or someone gets fired."

"So," I inquired, "who are they?"

"I've only talked to the wife, so far. The husband's working on business which is why they're here in the first place. They're _newlyweds_—"

"No way!" I interrupted and Sango laughed.

"My reaction exactly! But the husband is in the area for business dealings over the next few months, and since Rin, the wife, doesn't want to spend so much time apart from him, she joined him. Neither of them wanted to stay in a hotel for the summer. They only just started looking for a place when they happened upon our childhood home. Apparently, hubby's business' lawyers know Auntie's. I showed her around today and she loved the place. Oh Kagome, I can't wait for you to me her, she's so nice. I know that you'll like her."

"Mmm," I smiled into the phone before promptly yawning.

"Didn't mean to bore you," she replied, laughter in her voice.

"Sorry," I apologized, blushing; although, I knew Sango couldn't see me. "I just had trouble sleeping last night. I had a lot of my mind." Understatement of the year.

"Are you okay?"

"Yeah, I'm fine. Anyways, is there anything else you need? I kinda need to get back to work given that I slept through lunch." Sango laughed as I recounted my nap. "Jak woke me up just in time."

"That's good. So, I was thinking, since we don't have family dinners for a little while, that we could have dinner over the weekend. Kinda make it a weekly thing before we have to go back to the regular ones."

"That sounds fine," I add.

"I was hoping you'd say that. I'm inviting the neighbors."

"Okay. I'll see you Friday?" I inquired.

"That's what I was thinking. Bye now."

"Bye Sango." I hung up before taking a deep breath and banging my head down on my desk with a thump. I sighed, so exhausted I wanted to cry. Why, oh why, couldn't I just let Inuyasha go? Why did he haunt me, for you years later? Things had ended badly, yes, but four years! Four whole years! It was a long time. Surely, by now, I should be able to move on. I rubbed my temples, trying to ward off the headache I knew was coming, but I didn't lift my head off the desk.

It was time that I made a resolution. From now on, I would put this whole Inuyasha Azuma thing behind me. I was done pining away for what I couldn't have. I needed a plan, and I needed one now. Step 1: Remove all things Inuyasha from my life including, but not limited to, photos, letters, cards, CDs, interviews, and, most importantly, my engagement ring, which might just fetch me a pretty penny if I sold it. Step 2: Find a guy to date. It was okay if I didn't like him at first. If I gave it time, I just might. Step 3: In pursuit of said guy, stop comparing him to Inuyasha! Step 4: Find the actual guy for me, forget all about this Inuyasha mess, get married, have kids, find a better job, and stop being an utter failure.

Yup, plan Move On From Inuyasha (M.O.F.I.) just might work. I think. The phone next to me rang and I screeched in shock, my head flying up from the desk. Frantically, I grabbed the phone and answered it, "Tokugawa Publishing."

"That's what you get for falling asleep again!" My eyes widened and I turned to look down the corridor. Jakotsu was in the middle of it, sitting in his chair, phone to his ear. He waved at me. "Try to stay awake, love!" I stared at him in shock for a second before I uttered,

"I wasn't sleeping."

"Well, that's not what it looked like from here."

"Oh, screw you," I responded, raising my middle finger in the air. Mature, I know.

"Higurashi!" a voice, not from the phone, gasped from behind me. The blood drained from my face and I slowly turned around in my chair, and came face to face with my boss and two of his associates, standing in the lobby. In my shock, I hadn't lowered my finger. His eyes narrowed at me, and while Myouga was a nice old man, I don't think that even he would understand why I was flipping him off. Slowly, I lowered my finger and my head. "Is there a problem?"

"No sir," I whispered, my voice subdued.

"Then I suggest you get back to work."

"Right away." He walked past me and back into his office. When the door shut, I let out a breath I wasn't aware I was holding.

* * *

The rest of the week came and went in a similar fashion. I still wasn't getting much sleep, but I tried. By Friday I had almost had six hours of sleep. So it was getting better. My boss had apparently chosen to forget the incident and when he walked in the next day greeted me with a smile. But even though that was taken care of, it still didn't stop all the tiny things that went wrong to aggravate me more. Paper cuts, angry clients, creditors. Combined with the fact that Inuyasha was still on my mind and I'd made no effort to implement Plan: M.O.F.I. and the week could be considered a disaster. I was hoping that dinner with Sango and Miroku would lift my spirits a bit.

When I entered their house on Friday night, dressed in jeans and a pretty teal blouse, I was hoping for a quiet evening mixed with a small meet-n-greet. I was interested to see who would be living in our childhood home while our mother was going crazy at the beach. But the moment I got there, I knew that wouldn't be the case. Eri greeted me at the door and I felt dread sink into me. While it's true that Eri, her twin sister Ayume, and I all were pretty close in high school, but that wasn't entirely the case anymore. Sure, I liked them well enough. They were fairly good friends. The problem was that I had grown up since high school and Eri and Ayume had never felt the need to. They were still as superficial as ever.

"Kagome, darling! I'm glad you've arrived!" Eri called to me and kissed me on both cheeks. I smiled at her.

"It's been a while. How are you?" I asked politely.

"Uggh, I've certainly been better. You know how I get when Ayume brings her lovers around. I mean, I really don't care who she's sleeping with these days. But that's all she talks about. Quite frankly, I'm in need of more stimulating conversation." I fought back my urge to laugh in her face. Stimulating conversation? You mean dissing celebrities, talking fashion, and having everyone agree with her. Not quite what the rest of the world considers to be stimulating conversation. Instead of voicing this opinion, I asked,

"Ayume has a new boyfriend?" She rolled her eyes.

"He's positively dreadful. His name's Bankotsu and trust me, he's not even that cute." I nodded politely and we entered the sitting room where we were faced with a slightly embarrassed Sango, a calm, collected Miroku, slightly amused guests, and one fuming Ayume. I sat down, and when Miroku offered me a drink, I accepted gratefully, Ayume and Eri's bickering escalating. Ignoring her sisters-in-law, Sango cleared her throat.

"Kagome, this is Rin and Sesshoumaru Nakamura."

"It's nice to meet you," I held out my hand and Rin shook it. Sesshoumaru looked at it with disdain, but eventually gave it a firm shake, before promptly going back to glaring at me. Sango rattled on about how they arrived at our old house but I tuned her out, slightly confused as to why this man was treating me with open hostility. His wife had treated me with friendliness, but this Sesshoumaru seemed to hate me on sight. I studied him a bit. He had long silver hair that was tied back and piercing golden eyes. He was the epitome of elegance and I had to admit that he looked strangely familiar. And then it hit me.

When we were dating, Inuyasha had mentioned that he had a half brother whom he didn't get along with most of the time, but in recent years, since the death of his father, they had begun to slightly understand each other. He attributed the change of heart to his brother's girlfriend and the fact that Inuyasha was the only family he had left. And judging by the cold, hard stare, Inuyasha had also told him about me and had left nothing back. Even though we had never met, this man knew almost more about me than Sango did.

"Anyways, so because Sesshoumaru will be out and about, sometimes gone for a couple days, my brother-in-law will be arriving sometime in the week to keep me company," Rin stated brightly. I almost dropped my drink. Inuyasha was coming here? Oh dear god.

"That's wonderful."

"Yes, Inuyasha is really sweet. He's taking a break from promoting his new album to pay attention to me."

"Wait," Eri interrupted, ignoring her sister, who was still arguing about her boyfriend. "Inuyasha, as in Inuyasha Azuma?" Rin nodded and Ayume promptly closed her mouth. The twins shared a look before the both squealed, differences clearly forgotten.

"Inuyasha Azuma is coming here!" They yelled at the same time, excitement clearly written on their faces. They began to jump up and down, screaming. Miroku had the decency to look embarrassed at his sisters; his face was red and he was purposefully not looking at them. Me, well, at the announcement, I felt slightly lightheaded and almost as if my heart had stopped beating. I downed my drink, knowing that there would be no way that I could avoid Inuyasha. I had told Sango that I would see her every week for dinner and I couldn't back out. I liked my sister too much. We certainly couldn't meet at my tiny apartment. It would have to be here. _He _would be here.

Fuck my life.

* * *

A/N: I'm sorry that this took so long to get up. I was supposed to post Thursday, before I left, but I had too much editing to do and not enough time to do it before I went down the shore for the weekend. But this was my first task when I got back and I have to say that I'm finally satisfied with the chapter. I hope you liked it! Reviews would be appreciated!

Emily

NaP


	4. 3:Dashboard

Turn On Me

Chapter 3-Dashboard

_Well it would have been, could have been, worse than you would ever know.  
Oh the dashboard melted but we still have the radio._

Dashboard by Modest Mouse

I dislike being late. It was one of the major pet peeves I had. But tonight, there was nothing that could drag me out of my house sooner than I had to. I waited until the last minute to get ready, took all the time in the world after that, and arrived at my sister's twenty minutes late. And that was fine with me. I was not looking forward to seeing Inuyasha again. Oh, part of me couldn't wait to lay eyes on him. It had been too long. But the other part of me, the practical, logical one, knew that it wasn't going to be easy to have something I longed for to be right in front of me but know that it was out of my grasp.

I entered the house quietly, my entire being filled with trepidation. This time, Eri didn't come to greet me. I walked slowly to the sitting room, hearing the soft voices of my family and friends in conversation. I peered into the doorway and sighed at the sight that greeted me. Miroku, Sango, and Rin were engaged in conversation. Sesshoumaru was nowhere to be found. I hope this meant he was away on business and wasn't in the kitchen poisoning my food or something. Miroku said something funny and the ladies laughed. On the sofa were Eri and Ayume, giggling like little girls. In between them was Inuyasha, looking somewhat uncomfortable at the attention he was getting from the girls. Eri had tucked her knees under her, her shoes consequently on the floor, and while she smiled at him in what appeared to be her 'seductive face', she ran her fingers lightly through his hair. She was enamored with him, I could tell. Ayume seemed genuinely in awe of having a famous musician sitting next to her, although I could tell from her body language that she wasn't interested in him _that way_. It appeared that she was giving way for Eri to make her move. I wondered if it had anything to do with Bankotsu, her latest fling. I sure hope it did, because that meant that Ayume had finally found someone who would make her happy.

After analyzing the intentions of my friends, I finally let my eyes rest on Inuyasha. I prayed for a few more moments to myself, before Sango realized I was leaning against the archway, to prepare myself to step in the room and face it all. He looked good. Really good. Time had only made him more handsome, in my opinion. I allowed myself a small, secret smile as I gazed at his figure. I could tell he wasn't having a good time, that he would rather be anywhere but my sister's sitting room, being pestered by girls who had issues stringing together intelligent sentences. He wasn't tense in his distaste. He accepted it for what it was. He was always good at making the best out of a bad situation. I wondered if he knew that Sango was my sister, that I was supposed to be here. He was certainly relaxed, if he did know. I was still freaking out, even though the reality of it all was right in front of me.

Eri leaned over and whispered something in his ear, giggling like the twit she was. Inuyasha rolled his eyes, but Eri didn't seem to notice. He whispered something back to her, something that was probably insulting, but Eri didn't get it, and smiled brightly at receiving his undivided attention. Ayume picked up a magazine that was lying on the coffee table about home decorating, leafing through it now, knowing that she was going to be ignored for a little while. Quickly bored, she reached into her pocket and took out her cell, checking her text messages. She smiled and began to press buttons. I assumed she got a message. Eri slowly dragged her finger along Inuyasha's jaw. His eyebrows raised up but he didn't stop her.

Slowly, his eyes turned in my direction. His eyebrows went back down and he furrowed them, in concentration. I could feel myself flame up under his gaze. He didn't recognize me. Then his eyes widened with acknowledgment and he turned back to Eri. "Kagome! Honey, how long have you been standing there?" Sango stood and gave me a one armed hug as her other hand held her drink. I hugged her back.

"Not long Sango. I just arrived. I'm sorry I'm late."

"You had me worried for a little while. You're never late." I shrugged, the excuse I had gone over in the car gone from my mind.

"It's wonderful to see you again, Kagome. I can't tell you enough how much I enjoyed being here last week," Rin chimed in.

"I'm glad," I replied, a little bit confused. I certainly hadn't added much to the evening last week. Besides, she couldn't be completely oblivious to her husband's obvious dislike of me. Could she?

"Well, you see," Sango continued, "Kagome and I are in such a habit of seeing each other at our weekly family dinners that I honestly couldn't think of a week without her. The fact that you two moved in so quickly really just gave me the opportunity to entertain. Miroku and I bought this house not too long ago and we haven't had nearly enough of a chance to entertain."

"Oh my, where are my manners?" I supposed it suddenly dawned on Rin that while we had been discussing the previous week, I had yet to be introduced. "Kagome, this is my brother in law, Inuyasha." I gave him a strained smile.

"Uh, yea…hey." The minute the words left my mouth, I wanted to take them back. Uh, yeah hey?! Could I sound any more stupid? Four years, and the best I could come up with was Uh, yeah hey. I silently prayed for the floor to split into two and swallow me up. He nodded at me.

"Hey. Good to see you." His voice was flat, indicating that, in reality, it was not good to see me. He didn't look surprised to see me, though. I'm sure Sesshoumaru had told him of my presence. I nodded enthusiastically at his comment, my strained smile stretching further on my face. God, who was this crazy person possessing my body?

"You two know each other?" Sango questioned.

"We went to college together," Inuyasha replied. "We weren't really friends, but we certainly knew each other." God, he sounded so nonchalant about the whole affair. Had I tried to explain, it would have been an absolute disaster.

"You went to college together?" Eri screeched, "Why didn't you say something sooner, Kagome?" I blushed bright red and looked the other way, shrugging. Awkward silence fell over us.

"Well, Kagome, can I get you a drink?" Miroku offered.

"Yes please," I asked eagerly. "a French martini if it's not too much trouble."

"Not at all." A moment later, I had my drink and everyone had resumed talking. I took a seat on a chair near the sofa where Inuyasha and the girls were sitting.

"So you really went to college with our Kagome?" Inuyasha nodded. "I imagine that must've been lovely. I visited her once, her freshman year, I think. It was a gorgeous place."

"Yeah," he responded, but was not more forthcoming. His eyes strayed over to me, catching me watching him. I blushed and turned away, only to glance back a second later. His eyes were already back on Eri.

"What'd you major in?"

"Music." Eri huffed at the lack of attention she was now receiving.

"I majored in fashion design and merchandizing at school," Eri continued to try to flirt with my ex, which I'm sure she would have done even if she had _known_ the history between us, "I'm a fashion designer." I rolled my eyes at her.

"Well, I suppose that is what one does with a degree in fashion."

"It's…my _passion_. Surely, someone such as yourself understands about _passion_." I gagged on my drink as she said this, causing me to cough as the liquid went down the wrong pipe. I put my drink down and continued to hack, getting up and excusing myself. I exited the room and walked toward the bathroom, my coughing subsiding as I went. Still gasping for air, I entered the bathroom and locked the door. Taking a couple of deep breaths, I slid down the door and rested on the floor. So that was it huh? A hello and not another word after that? Truthfully, it's more than I deserved. He hated me; that much was clear. There was no way that this situation could be salvaged. I was just going to have to suck it up and put on my best cheery face and avoid him. I didn't have to talk to him, to watch him; he certainly wasn't going to do it to me. I would just have to focus on Miroku and Sango, maybe Rin. In a few weeks, this whole affair would be over. My heart ached and I pressed the heel of my hands into my eyes, trying to force the tears that began to gather to go away.

It could've been worse, was the only thing. In all honestly, considering our past, the first meeting between us after these long years could have been worse.

Without another thought, I got up, washed my hands and my face, patted them dry with a towel. I sighed, unlocking the door and closing it shut behind me.

"Oh, there you are!" I looked up and was met with the amiable eyes of my brother-in-law.

"Looking for me?" I questioned lightly.

"As a matter of fact, I was. You'd been gone a while. I wanted to make sure my favorite sister-in-law hadn't keeled over and died." Miroku smiled and put his arm around my shoulders, walking with me slowly back to the sitting room.

"Favorite sister-in-law?" I snorted. "Well, considering that your other option is Kikyo, it's no doubt that I'm your favorite. It's like asking a starving man to choose between filet mignon and a rock."

"I know, that's exactly why I need to make sure that you're not going to fall over dead on me." I laughed. "Seriously, though, Kagome, are you okay?" He stopped and turned to me.

"I'm fine, Miroku. Why?"

"You've been acting odd lately, ever since dinner last week." Had I been that transparent? "Sango's noticed it too and is starting to suspect that she's done something." I laughed weakly.

"It's nothing, Miroku. Certainly not something Sango may or may not have done. I'm just…sorting through some things." I forced myself to smile, trying to reassure Miroku; he only looked more apprehensive after I had done it though.

"If you need anything, anything at all, you just have to ask. Sango and I are here for you, Kagome." I hugged him.

"I know, Miroku. I just need to get it all sorted out in my head first. Then, I promise, I'll tell you and Sango both what's going on. Now, please, stop worrying about me and let's go back and entertain our guests." We walked down the rest of the hallway and as we rounded the corner to the entrance of the room, Inuyasha's voice reached our ears.

"I barely recognized her, to be honest." I stopped, forcing Miroku to as well. "She looks different than when we were in college. Time has not been her friend. It's a pity. She used to be rather pretty." I looked at Miroku, who looked shocked to hear something from a man he had only just met and surmised to be a decent fellow. He gazed troublingly back at me, as if expecting me to break down right in front of him. I didn't. Honestly, it surprised me too. Instead, I felt rage bubbling in the pit of my stomach and I fought the urge to run in there and scream at him like I had when I was nineteen. But as quickly as it came, the rage disappeared. It was true after all. It wasn't particularly nice, but it was true. I patted Miroku's arm to let him know that I was okay, that the whole situation was okay. We walked back into the room, ignoring the shocked and guilty faces, and I sat back down in my chair and picked up my drink. I took a rather large sip and sighed contentedly as the alcohol got into me.

As we exited the sitting room to head to the dining room for the actual meal, I realized that the whole evening wasn't quite as bad as I thought it was going to be. Sure, it wasn't perfect. Inuyasha didn't leap into my arms and kiss me senseless, but there had been no real insults, no dramatics. Apart from the fact that our past was looming over us like a black cloud, it was a relatively normal night.

* * *

_We were lying in bed, practically on top of each other. Dorm room twin beds were not exactly the roomiest for one person, let alone two. His hand was threaded through my hair, my head on his chest, the sheets wrapped around us. I was slowly tracing patterns on his skin with the tip of my finger. I looked into his eyes and smiled, genuinely at him. He grinned back at me. _

"_God, what took us so long to get to this point?" I asked with a laugh. He leaned down and kissed me._

"_Eh, I don't mind that it took us years to realize it all. I don't think we could have handled it. We woulda crashed and burned." I shrugged._

"_You don't know that. Imagine all that time we wasted being angry with each other that we could have been happy. It's kind of depressing." He kissed me again, slowly this time._

"_Stop thinking depressing thoughts in my bed. That's rule number one."_

"_No sad thoughts in the bed?" I asked with a laugh._

"_Mmhmm." _

"_That has to be the strangest rule I've ever heard of," I remarked, matter-of-factly. _

"_I'm serious," he responded. "When we're in bed, we only think of happy things, okay?" I nodded._

"_Okay," I consented, seeing his point. "Well, then, happy things."_

"_Yes. Happy things."_

"_Well, I guess I'll say I'm excited about graduation."_

"_Me too. You have any plans after?" I shrugged._

"_I want to write a novel, I think. Just one, to start. I'll wait tables or something until it's complete and published. I'm sure you're going to go be some hot shot musician in the city and get a recording contract in a week." He laughed._

"_If only we were all that talented and lucky."_

"_But you are! I mean, I'm not even sure why you bothered to go to college. You're amazing." He truly was._

"_Eh, it's something I promised my old man I'd do. He never went to college. You know, one of those, my children have to have a better life than me. He knew that all I wanted to do was play music and he was fine with that. I just had to go to college first. I wasn't thrilled about it at first. Hell, I really hated it. But then he passed away and, while I wanted to drop out, I knew that I couldn't. I had given him my word that I'd graduate and even though he wasn't around to make sure that I did, I knew that I would." I kissed him. _

"_You're a good man, Inuyasha. A good, talented, kind, thoughtful, respectful, handsome man and your dad would be incredibly proud of you." His lips crashed onto mine and we shifted in the bed, so that he was on top of me._

* * *

I woke up the next morning with a groan as Sango opened the drapes, sunlight flooding my room and causing the pain to intensify in my head. "Up, up, up sleepy head!"

"Go to hell," I muttered at my sister as I squinted at her. I had the worst, god awful hangover in the world. I obviously drank too much the night before. I suppose I must've been too sloshed to drive home safely, which would explain the fact that I was in my sister's guest room.

"You have a visitor," she told me, shoving two ibuprofen and a glass of water in my hands, helping me to sit up.

"Who?"

"Inuyasha. He said he needed to talk to you about something. So get up, get dressed, brush your hair, and do it all quickly! I mean it Kagome." She exited the room and I took the two pills and drank the whole glass of water before I got out of bed. I put on the dress I was wearing the night before (I assumed that Sango changed me into a pair of pajamas I was currently wearing) and walked slowly to the bathroom, my head still throbbing in pain. I brushed my hair and washed my face, taking some time to examine myself in the mirror. Exiting the bathroom, I paused at the top of the stairs, debating whether or not I actually wanted to go down there. And although my head hurt, I knew that Sango would only be back if I didn't arrive soon and she would force me down, whether I wanted to go or not. I took a deep breath and began to descend the stairs. And there he was, leather jacket still on as he stood nervously in the foyer.

"What can I do for you?" He jumped slightly.

"Hey, Kagome. Uh, well, you see…" I sighed exasperatedly.

"Get to the point, Inuyasha. I'm tired, I have a killer headache, and I haven't showered yet."

"I was wondering if you wanted to take a walk with me." I blinked, confused.

"Um…what?"

"Take a walk with me. God wench, it's not a hard concept. You put one foot in front of the other outside while I do the same thing beside you." I rolled my eyes.

"You're making the decision to say no to you so hard, Inuyasha." I bit out sarcastically. He sighed in annoyance before he grabbed hold of my arm and began to drag me outside.

"Hey!" I screamed out, "What do you think you're doing?!"

"We need to talk," was all he said. Well, that didn't sound promising at all.

* * *

A/N: A little shorter and a little later than usual. I'm sorry it took so long. I had major issues with this chapter. This is seriously the fourth or fifth draft and so much has changed from my original outline that I'm not quite sure what's what anymore. Hell, I'm still not happy with this version, but whatever. I wash my hands of it.

Thanks to the few reviewers I had last time. I'm guessing that the last chapter wasn't that well liked, due to the lack of response. I hope this one is better (although I'm sure that it's not).

Let me know what you all think!

Emily

NaPs


	5. 4:Gleaming Auction

Turn On Me

Chapter 4-Gleaming Auction

_You're the one with the attitude  
Don't try and make me out  
To be the root of the evil in  
The whole rotten affair  
Lie back and suffer now  
We've both earned our reward_

Gleaming Auction by Snow Patrol

We were halfway down the driveway before I managed to wrestle my arm out of his hold. "What the _hell_ do you think you're doing?" I screeched. He smirked at me.

"Ah there's some of the old Kagome coming back." I glowered at him.

"Give me one good reason to not walk right back into the house," I demanded, anger filling my entire being. Who the hell did he think he was? I don't care if he's some sort rock star now, he could not just drag me out of my sister's house and not expect a fight.

"Because I need to talk to you without ears listening in on the conversation," he said, exasperatedly. I rolled my eyes.

"No one in that house would be listening in on our conversation." He scoffed.

"Your sister is a busy-body. She was hovering around the entire time I was waiting for you." I stared at him skeptically.

"She lives there, Inuyasha. It's her house! She would not listen in on our conversation. She respects me too much to eavesdrop on me."

"Oh yeah? Then what about the fact that she's staring out the window now looking at us." I twirled around and was shocked to see that he was telling the truth. Having been caught, Sango's face was red. The curtains were quickly moved back into place. Sighing, I looked back at Inuyasha.

"Okay, so what did you want to tell me that is so important that my sister couldn't hear it." I stood with my arms crossed over my chest, my hip cocked out to the side. The frown on my face told everyone who saw me that I was annoyed.

"Seriously? You're _mad_ at me?" he asked me, shocked. I rolled my eyes again.

"Yes, Inuyasha, I'm angry!"

"Of course. God, this is so typical of you! Getting angry at the stupidest things. Jumping to conclusions and not letting the other party speak. You won't even let me explain myself!" He exclaimed.

"Typical of_ me_? How about this is so typical of _you_! Forcing me out here like a Neanderthal without ever considering that maybe I don't _want_ to talk to you."

"I was just trying to help," he spat at me. "Guess no good deed really does go unpunished."

"Oh stop being so dramatic. It's not like you were trying to save my life or anything. Besides, I fail to see how dragging me outside to 'talk' is _helping_ me in any way at all!"

"Well, considering the warm welcome I got last night, I'm going to assume that your sister and your friends _don't know_." I pressed my lips together until I'm sure they turned white. This is not what I wanted to do the day after meeting up with the ex I never really got over; I did not want to talk about this with him.

"So?" I asked, defensively.

"Well, we need to air some things out. I thought you might not like your loved ones to find out from our screaming." We stared each other down for a few seconds. I didn't say anything in response. "Thank you isn't that hard to say, is it?"

"How considerate of you," I spoke dryly. "You're such a gentleman I don't know why I ever broke up with you." He grimaced.

"God, when'd you get the stick up your ass?"

"About the same time that I stopped being pretty," I answered bitingly. He colored slightly and cleared his throat, looking the other way.

"You weren't supposed to hear that," he whispered semi-apologetically.

"I gathered. Still doesn't change the fact that it was a shitty thing to say about anyone, let alone someone that you haven't seen or spoken to in four years."

"Well, whose fault is that? I didn't want you to break up with me. Hell, I actually thought I was in love with you."

"Stop playing the victim!" I screamed, running my hands through my hair in frustration. "You act like you were the only one hurt by the breakup. I assure you, I was just as much in love with you as you were with me!" He laughed, although it wasn't a happy sound.

"Clearly not because you _broke up_ with me," he said with barely restrained anger. I myself was seeing red. I didn't say anything, just glared at him with the most murderous look I could muster. He took a deep breath and let it out, his body shuddering in defeat. "Look, I didn't bring you out here to fight. Hell, it's actually the opposite. I wanted to call a truce. I realize that we're in some really awkward situations. I…just want to get through the next few weeks incident free."

"You want a truce?" I asked him suspiciously. I wasn't quite sure what to make of it. He nodded.

"I'm not suggesting we turn into best friends or anything. But we should be able to be in the same room with each other without letting on that we had a failed relationship."

"And you won't tell my family?" He nodded again.

"I'm sure you have a reason for not telling them. Hell, I wasn't even aware that you were close with your younger sister." I shrugged.

"It's a somewhat new development. It's only happened in the past few years." I commented, bringing my arms in tighter around my torso and looking the other way.

"But…I mean…why wouldn't you tell them? I told my family." I laughed at this.

"Oh, I'm well aware. Your brother was sending me death glares last week." He colored at this statement and it made me smile. Good. Be embarrassed. Jerk. "I didn't tell them because well…there is no real reason. I just don't like to talk about it. They know there was someone, but they don't know specifics," I admitted.

"Oh. So you don't care about them finding out?" He questioned. I shook my head.

"If you had brought this up before you met them, although I don't know why you would have, I would have said I didn't. Now though…the only purpose our failed relationship serves is to put distance between our two families. And I don't want to do that. Sango really likes Rin. Eri and Ayume are practically in love with you. Hell, even Miroku is enjoying having more lively company than the rest of my family." He laughed.

"I can't see why. I mean, your family is rather amusing, in my opinion."

"Only to mock and from afar," I remarked. "After you actually have to spend time with them, the amusement quickly fades, I assure you." We laughed together, easily, as if we hadn't just been at each other's throats, as if I my actions hadn't left a wake of destruction between us. It was nice. It was more than nice. It was addicting, like a drug. The minute it ended, I wished I could go back and keep laughing. I wish that my entire life was spent laughing with Inuyasha about my family and enjoying each other's company. And then the next minute, I was quashing down the regret. It happened a lot. I would imagine what things would be life if I had said screw it all and married him. Or I would imagine what a moment in my life would have been like if I was married. It was a terrible, taunting game my mind played on me. I was usually better about making sure the regrets didn't get to me. It was dangerous if they did. They would be followed by another and another until I was bogged down with 'what ifs' and 'could have beens'. But being so close to Inuyasha was making it harder. Silence descended over us, comfortable, not awkward, and I allowed myself to relax slightly. "I heard you on the radio the other night," I admitted.

"Oh? Which one?"

"WECT. The song was really good."

"Feh," was his only comment. I assumed he didn't want to talk about it. It was odd, but who was I to question him at this point? "Tell me something, did you ever write a book?" I flushed slightly, embarrassed to admit that I hadn't done any sort of writing at all since I graduated.

"No. I work in a publishing company though."

"Really?" he asked, shocked. "I bet your some hot shot literary agent or a highly sought after editor or something," he continued, speculating. My blush intensified.

"Actually, I'm the administrative assistant," I said, barely above a whisper. God this was so embarrassing. Here we were, four years later, and not only was Inuyasha successful, he was nationally known at this point, and I had to admit that I worked a dead end job that pretty much anyone could do. Life just couldn't cut me a break.

"What exactly does that mean?" he questioned.

"I, uh, answer the phones and set up appointments. You know, that sort of thing."

"You're a secretary?" he stated, shocked and skeptical. I shrugged in agreement.

"I suppose some would see it that way." Myself included.

"If someone had told me five years ago that I would have a recording contract and that you would be working as a secretary, I wouldn't have believed them. Why aren't you writing? What happened?" I shrugged.

"I just…didn't want to write anymore. Besides, unless I get published, I don't get paid. And the thought of not being able to pay my rent and having to move back home terrifies me."

"Can't you work and write?" I shrugged again.

"When I find something worth writing, I'll do it. Until then…" I trailed off, not really sure how I wanted that sentence to end. This time, the silence between us was awkward.

"Yeah…uh…have you known Eri long?" I tensed.

"Since high school. We were in the same class. We spent a lot of time together, especially when I was over hanging out with Miroku."

"What?"

"We went out when I was like sixteen," I answered, in what I hoped was a nonchalant voice.

"And then he married your sister?" I nodded.

"Actually, I'm the one that introduced them. It's a little odd, I know, but they're made for each other. They're quite happy. As for Eri and Ayume, well, I can't say they've changed much since I've known them. Ayume's got a steady boy-something and Eri is currently single. So you should go for it," I commented. No. No you shouldn't go for it. Eri is a shallow, two dimensional diva that will do nothing but drag you down. Pick me, pick me, pick me!

"Go for what?" He questioned, his voice high with surprise or embarrassment, I wasn't sure. I rolled my eyes.

"It's obvious that you're into her. You wouldn't be asking about her if you weren't. If there is anything you aren't, it's subtle." He smirked slightly, his face tense and strained. I attributed it to the fact that he was embarrassed about his crush.

"I'm that obvious huh? So you think I've got a shot?"

"Does a bear shit in the woods?" I retorted, a forced smile on my face. "She's practically in love with you." No she wasn't. She was in love with your fame, with your money. She doesn't love you. _I love you_.

"Okay then," he said, his voice breathless and airy. "I should probably be going."

"You probably should." The fake smile stretched wider on my face.

"See you around, Higurashi!" He gave me a small wave, finished walking down the drive, and was off on his way before I could respond. It was almost as if this whole thing hadn't all happened. I almost wished it hadn't. Had I really just pushed Eri at Inuyasha, the man that I pined for these past years? Well, shit.

I trudged back up into the house, raking my hands through my hair absently, nervously. The minute I closed the door, Sango pounced.

"Well?"

"Well, what?" I responded, unsure as to what she was getting out.

"What did he say?" She all but screamed, "Oh gosh, did he ask you out? I hope he did. Wouldn't that just be so cute? He's been pining for you all these years since you met at college and only just now got the courage to ask you on a date." She sighed dreamily. I rolled my eyes.

"Before you start planning my wedding, you should know, he didn't ask me out."

"Well, then, what the hell were you discussing that was so secret?" I shrugged.

"Nothing in particular. He was asking for information about Eri. He didn't want to be overheard by anyone. It's a secret crush and all that." Sango laughed.

"Well, so much for it being a secret." I stuck my tongue out at her. "But really, Eri?" I shrugged.

"She's not so bad." Sango fixed me with a look. I sighed. "Okay, so, she can be a little shallow. But she's not a terrible person."

"She's after him for his money. If he wasn't famous, she wouldn't look twice at him," Sango said. "I like him. He seems to be a good guy. I'd hate for him to get in too deep with Eri and then get burned." I shrugged. Sure, I would've liked it to be me, but I knew it would never happen. We were done. That chapter in our loves was finished. If he wanted Eri, then I would wish him the best of luck. If he'd moved on, then perhaps I could finally let him go.

"He's a big boy. He can fend for himself. Besides, I'm a little more worried about Eri. He's got a love 'em and leave 'em reputation." I didn't know this for sure, but from what I could tell from the tabloids, in the past year alone, he was linked to six girls. Sango frowned a bit.

"I didn't get that vibe from him at all. And I'm an _excellent_ judge of character, you know." I rolled.

"Sango, you'd think Charles Manson wasn't evil, just misunderstood. You want to see the good in people so badly that you refuse to see their faults." Sango bristled at my comment, her lips pursed.

"Yeah well, you're not perfect either!" She snapped. I laughed.

"Oh believe me, I know," I commented. "Look, I think I'm gonna get my stuff and head home. Thanks for letting me crash."

"Kagome, wait!" she called out to me as I mounted the stairs. I turned back to look at her. "Aunt Kimi called while you were outside. She wants to see you the first chance you get." I sighed.

"Great." I looked down at the dress I was wearing, debating whether or not it would acceptable to go home and get some clean clothes, but I knew that Auntie K would be upset at having to wait so long. At least I hadn't stained the dress or anything. It was still relatively clean, even though I had donned it around 24 hours ago. I continued to climb the stairs and popped into the guest room to gather my purse. I told Sango good bye then got in my car and drove to my Aunt's house.

* * *

Hesitantly, I knocked on the door to my Aunt's study, her "inner sanctum" if you will. "Enter!" she called, her voice angry. I didn't really want to, but I opened the door. She whirled around, ignoring the man that was standing in front of her. Her face lightened slightly as she saw me. "Kagome!" I walked forward and hugged her.

"Hi Auntie. Am I interrupting something? I can wait." She shook her head.

"No, you don't need to. I'm done here. We're done here." The last statement was directed at the man. I gazed at him and frowned. Something was off about the man. He wasn't ugly. In fact, he was rather good looking. Shoulder length, black, wavy hair, deep brown eyes, an athletic build. Most women would consider him handsome. He was dressed in an all black suit and exuded such an air of nonchalance and cool that I was slightly intimidated. He gave me a quick once over and frowned before turning his attention back to my Aunt.

"Good day, Ms. Higurashi," he replied, his voice calm and silky. He picked up his briefcase off the floor and quickly left.

"Who was that?" I asked. My aunt shrugged.

"No one important. Just an incompetent fool. Would you like some tea?" Without waiting for a response, she poured me a cup. I sipped it politely.

"You wanted to talk to me?" I prompted after a couple moments of silence.

"Oh yes. I did." She paused, looking for the right words. "I just wanted you to know that I'm aware of who is staying in your mother's house." I shrugged.

"That's good to know, Auntie. I'd be concerned if you didn't thoroughly do a background check on Sesshoumaru and Rin, at the very least."

"I'm not referring to the renters. I'm referring to the relative that is freeloading with them." It dawned on me then why she wanted to talk to me.

"Oh. This is about Inuyasha." I took another sip of tea, purely for something to do that would keep me from saying something I shouldn't to my aunt. Don't get me wrong, I'm grateful for her for everything she's done for me, but the issue of Inuyasha is not something that I wanted to discuss with the woman who convinced me to say renege on my decision all those years ago.

"Of course this is about that miscreant," she told me, exasperated. "I'm sure it's not good for your health to be around him so much. I've got a conference to go to on Wednesday that will take me away for around three weeks. You are welcome to come with me."

"While I appreciate the offer, Auntie K," I started, hesitantly, "I can't take you up on it. I can't get three weeks off of work this quickly." I was hoping that excuse would be the end of it. But things with Aunt Kimi were not that simple.

"Give me your boss' phone number," she demanded. "I'll talk to him." I sighed.

"Really, it's okay. I'm fine. I barely have any contact with Inuyasha. And by the end of the summer, he'll be gone." Aunt Kim frowned.

"If you're sure…" I nodded.

"I am." I downed the rest of my tea. "Look, Aunt Kimi, it's lovely to see you, but I have to get going." She smiled at me.

"Of course, of course. Be sure to call me! I'll send you a post card from my conference." I nodded and smiled.

"Great. Bye." I stood up and hugged her before leaving, without looking back once.

* * *

When I arrived home, I dropped my purse by the door, kicked off my heels and went into the kitchen. The bottle of red wine was calling my name. I poured myself a glass and wandered over to my stereo, turning on some old Billie Holiday. And then I did something I hadn't done in a long time. I turned on my computer and opened a new document. For once, when I looked at the document, I didn't see it mocking me, taunting me about how much or how little was there. Instead, I saw the endless possibilities I had seen when I was twenty one. Without another thought, I placed my hands on the keyboard and began to write.

* * *

A/N: Oh my gosh. This chapter seems waaaay longer than the 3,200 words it is. It has taken me forever to write, sentence by sentence. I've been way too ADD lately to focus on writing. I've got a lot going on. Finishing up at work. Working out logistics for school (which is only 12 days away!). Dealing with Customs information and responsibilities for the fall. But I promise you, I'll have another chapter out by labor day at the latest (Sept. 7 for all my non-US residents). Which means that I'll be writing a bit during the beginning of the school year, but that will be it, really. I wanted to get this to chapter 5 before I go on hiatus for a while, while school is in session. Because after chapter 5, things are going to start picking up. I'm really looking forward to getting farther into this story.

I'd love to hear what you think. So review. Until next time,

Emily  
NaP


	6. 5:For the Widows in Paradise

Turn On Me

Chapter 5- For Widows in Paradise, For the Fatherless in Ypsilanti

_If there's anything to say  
If there's anything to do  
If there's any other way  
I'd do anything for you_

For Widows in Paradise, For the Fatherless in Ypsilanti by Sufjan Stevens

I woke up the next morning to the sound of my phone ringing on the bedside table. With a sigh, I raised my head from the pillows and reached out for it. Eri was the name across the screen and dread filled me. Without another thought, I picked it up. It was better to get this phone call over with.

"Hello?" I answered, sleepily.

"Kagome? Is that you?" I rolled my eyes.

"No, it's the Easter Bunny. Of course it's me, Eri!"

"Don't get mad. God. You just sound different. Are you sick?"

"No Eri. I'm not sick. I've just woken up though," I responded, my voice polite but strained.

"You're still sleeping until noon? I thought you stopped that in high school!" I frowned, glad that she wasn't physically in the room so that I couldn't strangle her.

"Is there a point to this phone call?" I asked, exasperatedly, not wanting to waste the time to explain to her that I had been up into the wee hours of the morning writing. I had forty pages on my computer that I needed to look over today.

"Uh, yes, yes there is," she replied, her voice nervous all of a sudden. I was surprised. I was sure that she was calling to tell me Inuyasha had asked her out. Why would that make her nervous.

"What's up, Eri?" I asked more sympathetically.

"You and Inuyasha went to school together right?"

"Yes," I answered hesitantly, not quite sure where this was going.

"Well then you knew him well?"

"Not…really," I got out. Part of me was rather annoyed with myself for lying about that, but I didn't want my family to suspect anything.

"Oh. Well, you had to have noticed something, right?" I shrugged even though she couldn't see it.

"I guess. Why are you asking, Eri?"

"Well, you see, he called me up today and asked me out." She didn't sound as excited about it as I would have thought she would be. The Eri I knew would have been shouting it from the rooftops. Not only had she bagged a handsome man, but rich and famous one at the same time.

"And you're not happy about that because?"

"Oh no, I'm incredibly happy…but, well, I was wondering if you had any advice for me. Like, what kinds of girls did he go for in college? What does he like?" She whined out and I felt sorry for her.

"Eri, you don't have to change who you are to get a guy to like you," I tried to console her.

"This isn't just any guy! This is Inuyasha Azuma! I just…want this date to go well." I sighed.

"It will be fine. I don't remember him dating much at school, but one thing that I noticed is that if he was interested, you knew. He would ask you out. He's noticed you already. You don't have anything to worry about. He wouldn't pursue you if it was just for a fling."

"But what if he changed?" She asked me, panicked.

"Then he's not worth it and I certainly can't advise you how to make him like you. Although, if you ask me, he already does. We talked about you yesterday," I admitted, hoping that this piece of information would make her realize that she didn't need my advice.

"Really?" She was intrigued.

"Yeah. He wanted the same thing you did; to see if you liked him. So I think you'll be fine. Get dressed up, go to dinner, be yourself, and in the end, you'll have a wonderful time." She was silent for a moment before she responded.

"Thanks Kagome. You're a really good friend." I smiled bittersweetly. As much as I appreciated the statement, I knew it wasn't true. If given the chance, I would steal Inuyasha away in a heartbeat.

"Look, Eri, I gotta go. I'll see you Friday, yeah?"

"Of course! See you then lovey! Muah!" I hung up and sighed, laying back in bed for a couple more minutes, ruminating on this next set of events. I expected to feel jealousy, anger, and sadness. But I didn't feel any of those things, at least not full force. The jealousy and regret were simmering under the surface, and the anger was fading quickly. The sadness was more pronounced, but not overwhelming. In fact, what I was feeling was relief. There wasn't any wondering what I could possibly do to make him look at me again. He was with Eri. If this was what he wanted, if Eri was what he wanted, then I could only do my best to make sure that both he and my friend were happy. And was the end of that. He was getting on with his life, so why couldn't I?

Without another thought, I closed my eyes and let sleep wash over me once more.

* * *

"_Oi! Higurashi!" the shout came from down the hall. I barely heard it, headphones in my ears blasting music in my ears. I paused and stooped my music, turning towards the boy who for years had been my tormenter and, only now, had been occupying my thoughts. _

"_Hey," I greeted him. He walked quickly to catch up to me, through the throng of people that were trying to get to class. "What's up?"_

"_Have dinner with me," he said calmly. I scrunched my brows in slight confusion._

"_Um, sure. I'll see you at the dining hall then." He rolled his eyes at me._

"_Not like that, wench! I meant in a restaurant. On Friday," he explained slowly, as if I was incapable of comprehending it. _

"_Well, not if you keep calling me wench!" I bit back. He only did it to get under my skin._

"_Feh, you know you'll say yes," he responded arrogantly._

"_Oh really? Just because I like you doesn't mean that I'm going to let you demean me!" I blushed the minute I realized that I had admitted to being romantically inclined towards him. He smirked at my statement._

"_Is that so? You know you like it when I call you wench."_

"_No woman likes to be called wench," I retorted. "It's demeaning and undignified. It suggests that women are inferior. I have a name, you know it, and I suggest that if you're serious about having another conversation with me, that you use it."_

"_Oh really, Ka-Go-Me? Let me rephrase then, bitch, will you go out with me." My eyes widened._

"_NO!" I shouted. He laughed at my reaction._

"_Well, I didn't call you wench."_

"_What in the world would make you think that by calling me bitch, which is worse than wench, I'd be willing to say yes?" I asked him, exasperatedly._

"_I just thought I'd point out that it could totally be worse than wench," he responded calmly, clearly amused by the whole situation. _

"_Ugh, you're so infuriating!" I exclaimed before stomping back off down the hall. He laughed at me._

"_You never did answer me, Kagome!" he called after me. "Are we on for dinner?"I whirled around and scowled at him._

"_Yes!" I shouted back. "But I'm not going to like it!"_

_Oh how wrong I was._

* * *

The next few weeks went by uneventfully. I went to work, I came home, I ate, I slept, occasionally, I'd get a call from Sango. Life had seemingly gone back to normal. On Fridays, I'd head to my sister's and enjoy the company of my family and generally ignore the fact that Inuyasha was sitting across from me, making googly eyes at one of my oldest friends. We didn't speak to each other more than the expected pleasantries. I knew that there wasn't much more time I'd have to put up with it. Soon enough, Aunt Kimi would demand that we go down to the beach house and visit my mother and Kikyo. She dreaded it as much as the rest of us did, but she knew what society expected of her. Which is why, when she called to let me know that her business trip was going to take more time than expected, I was shocked. We weren't going to leave for quite a bit more time. But I just grinned and bore it. There was no point in dwelling on what wouldn't happen. Besides, now that the first shock of it all was over, I had to say that it was getting easier.

But as I had learned at the start of this summer, life liked to mess with me.

One Tuesday afternoon, I was sitting at my desk at work. It had been quiet. There were very few meetings, no phone calls to be dealt with. I had taken to playing solitaire on the computer. It was like any other day. And up until that point, I was thinking of going out and enjoying myself after work. Have a drink with Jakotsu and some other coworkers, perhaps. See a movie. Curl up on my couch with a pint of ice cream and watch trashy reality TV. Oh the possibilities. But it all came crashing down around me when my boss popped his head out of his office and called out my name.

I jumped in surprise with a small screech. I quickly closed out my solitaire game and turned to face Myouga. "Yes sir?" I squeaked. He nodded his head towards his office.

"I need to speak with you." He sounded serious and tired. His face was drawn as he allowed me into the office, closing the door quietly behind me. He shuffled back to his desk, his head bowed, unable to look me in the eye.

"Kagome, you know how much I appreciate the work you've done here over the years," he began, his grandfatherly voice giving me no comfort this time.

"Sir?" I asked hesitantly, not really sure if I was going to like where this is going.

"But I'm afraid that it's just not enough. In this economy, we've had to reevaluate our budget and in order for the company to stay afloat, I'm afraid that I'm going to have to terminate your position." The color drained completely from my face and I sat there, complete still, not saying a word. "This is not a reflection of your work. In fact, Kagome, you've been fantastic. I'm sorry to lose you." I swallowed, trying to get rid of the lump in my throat. It didn't help.

"You're firing me?" I croaked out, still shocked. Myouga shook his head.

"I'm not firing you, Kagome. I'm letting you go. You'll get your full severance package, I promise." I still didn't move.

"I, I'm not sure what to say, sir." He sighed.

"Neither do I. The company is downsizing. With everything going digital now, the publishing industry is taking a real hit. It's amazing that we've lasted this long, especially in this economy. And as much as I would love to keep you around, financially, I just can't. Please understand, Kagome." I nodded.

"I think I do sir. I guess I'll just pack my things and go." I stood slowly and made my way to the door.

"Kagome!" Myouga called out to me. I paused. "If it makes any sense, I think we both knew that this would never last. I am blessed to have had you as my assistant, but we both know you're destined for bigger things. So take this opportunity and run with. I expect to see great things from you in the future." I nodded at him, not trusting my voice. Affection for him welled in my heart. This was the man who had given me a chance right out of college when no one else would. I had no experience but he took one look at me and said that I had the job. I would forever be thankful to him. I closed the door behind me and walked back to my desk, I began to pack up my things but that didn't take long. Nearly four years of working there and I had accumulated very little. I walked past Jakotsu's office on my way out and waved goodbye. He smiled at me sadly and waved back.

I entered the elevator, and as the doors closed, I sunk against the wall. What was I going to do now?

* * *

I drove to Sango's. It was the only place that I could think of to go. I certainly didn't want to go home to my apartment, which I couldn't afford now, and wallow by myself. That would lead down a road that I did not want to go down. I rang the bell and waited for Sango to answer the door. Nothing stirred. Desperate, I rang it twice in succession. C'mon, answer the door! But no one came. Belatedly, I remembered that Sango had her book club on Tuesday evenings and would probably not be in. With a frustrated groan, I sat down on her front stoop, hunched over. I'm not sure how long I stayed there, but eventually, Rin's voice reached my ear.

"Is everything okay, Kagome?" I glanced up to see her at the end of the driveway, looking at me with concern. I shrugged.

"Not really," I answered. She walked up the driveway and placed her hand on my shoulder.

"C'mon, I'll make some tea." Like a lost puppy, I followed her to my old house up the road. I sat down at the table while Rin set the kettle to boil. Tired I leaned my head down on the surface and waited for her to come back. When the tea was finally done, she sat down. She handed me a mug with a some earl grey in it and I smiled as I took a sip. It was more comforting that I thought it would be. "So what happened?"

"I lost my job today," I admitted. She gasped.

"Oh sweety! That's terrible," she consoled me. I gave her a weak smile. "What happened?" I shrugged.

"The company can't afford to pay for my position anymore. So they let me go." She placed her hand over mine.

"That's unfortunate. But I'm sure you'll find a job you love soon." I nodded, taking in her words. I finally looked up from the table and to my surprise, Sesshoumaru was glowering in the doorway. I startled and Rin noticed. She turned towards her husband and frowned at the sight of him. She gave him a look and with one last scowl, he turned on his heel at left. She rolled her eyes. "Men!"

"He doesn't seem to like me very much." I commented. Rin shrugged.

"I know. He's stupid though, so don't you pay him any mind. You're welcome here whenever."

"Thanks. But I wouldn't want to intrude."

"He holds grudges," Rin explained. "I, for one, try to get to know people before I decide they're heartless harpies that want to ruin the lives of good men." My eyes widened at the statement. Is that really what he thought of me? "So you broke up with his brother! Big deal! If it wasn't working, it wasn't working. It was better that you broke things off than lead him on. Inuyasha seems to be fine. He can, after all, stand to be in the same room as you, unlike my husband." I colored at this.

"Yeah well, if it was the other way around, I can't exactly say that I'd be treating him any differently."

"Kagome," Rin began, her voice capturing my attention. "You didn't do anything wrong. Break ups are part of life. If you didn't love him anymore, then it wasn't meant to be. It took Inuyasha a while, but I think he finally understands that. You do, too, I'm sure. Life goes on, even after the worst break ups. " I nodded, not having the heart to tell her that she was wrong, that I still loved and had always loved Inuyasha. It certainly wasn't going to do me any good now. The most I could hope for was friends, and even then, that would depend upon where his relationship with Eri would go.

* * *

A/N: Happy Labor Day! I thoroughly enjoyed my day off and in the process, managed to write this up for you all. It's completely unedited because I'm must too lazy/busy to be bothered right now. Let me know if you see any mistakes. See you all in October!

Emily  
NaP


	7. 6:Oxford Comma

Turn On Me

Chapter 6-Oxford Comma

_I haven't got the words for you  
All your diction dripping with disdain  
Through the pain  
I always tell the truth_

Oxford Comma by Vampire Weekend

_I wasn't sure where exactly I was. All I could see was a thick fog in front of me. The path below me was asphalt. To my left there was a lamp post, also black, the halo of light it cast forth enveloping my immediate position. On either side of the path was green, crisp grass touched with dew, limp leaves hanging heavily, tinted gray by the fog. Without hesitation, I began to move forward. I exited the circle of light, moving into the dark. Soon, another lamp post appeared in the distance; the white light emitting forth was barely discernable in the fog. I kept moving towards it, my decision unwavering. It never once occurred to me to be scared of my environment, to be wary of what I couldn't see. I just focused on the light. Deep inside me, I knew that there was something waiting for me under that next light. I shivered slightly; the air was brisk. I walked for a long time, but the lamp light did not get any closer. The only sound I could hear was that of my shoes on the path. There was no rustle of leaves or chirping of crickets. Silence echoed through my ears. At last, in frustration, I stopped and screamed. As soon as the sound emerged from my mouth, it disappeared. I screamed again, but the same phenomenon happened. I tried to speak, at a normal volume, but even then, my voice was lost. I held my neck gently and hummed slightly. The telltale vibration gently coursed through my hand; my vocal cords worked. But the sound never reached my ears._

_But the sound of footsteps did. I turned around and around, trying to figure out which direction they were coming from; I couldn't tell. As they got closer, they got louder and louder until they were pounding through my being. I tried to scream again, this time scared, but again, the sound was trapped inside me. Frantically, I turned back towards the light I had been chasing and ran towards it. I reached it, although the footsteps were right behind me, or so I thought. I leaned one hand against the lamp post, letting the light envelop me as I tried to catch my breath. I could go no farther. There was a brick wall in front of me, cornering me. It stretched high into the sky, so high that I could not see the top through the fog. On either side of me, it stretched out into the fog, no end in sight. The footsteps stopped._

"_What are you doing here?" I turned around, face to face with Inuyasha, his white hair gleaming underneath the lamp light, his golden eyes flashing in a slightly menacing way. The appearance of a familiar figure did nothing to ease my panic. I tensed even more, and tried to answer his question._

"_I don't know, where is here?" I asked, but the sounds didn't emerge. I frowned, frustrated._

"_So you're not gonna answer me. Well, that's fine. I don't really want to hear what you've got to say."_

"_It's not that I don't want to answer you, I can't!" I tried again, with no success. With a sigh, I shut my mouth and waited for Inuyasha to continue._

"_I don't really understand you anymore, Kagome. Who are you? You're certainly not the girl I used to know. The girl I used to know would stick up for herself, didn't just do what people wanted her to. Well, I guess I was wrong. You never really were that girl, were you?" I didn't try to respond. It was no use._

"_God, why don't you just say something, you coward!" He screamed at me. I winced. "SAY SOMETHING!"_

"_I can't!"This time, my voice was heard. His face was hard at my response, judgmental._

"_You're pathetic," he spat._

"_I'm not!" I protested._

"_Yes, you RING." I startled as the sound of a phone ringing punctuated his sentence. He continued, like nothing happened, went on ranting, but the only sound that emerged was the ringing of a telephone. Not just any telephone. My telephone._

* * *

I woke up with a gasp, disoriented. The phone was ringing. Blindly, I reached for it on my bedside table and picked it up. I glanced at the clock. 1:49. I didn't have time to form coherent thought. "Hello?" I croaked out. The sound of shrieking laughter reached its way to my ears and I winched.

"Damn it, woman, give me the phone," An unknown male voice said. A heard the sounds of a slight scuffle as, I'm assuming, the man tried to take the phone from the woman. I sat up straighter, concerned.

"Who is this?" I demanded. There was silence for a moment, followed by an exacerbated sigh.

"I'm sorry to bother you so late at night. This is Kagome, right?"

"Yes, this is. Now just who are you?" I was starting to get impatient.

"We haven't met, but my name's Bankotsu, I'm, well, I was Ayume's boyfriend." In the background I could hear a woman, I'm assuming it was Ayume, cry out.

"Kagome's on the phone!! I love Kagome. Kagome is the best best friend ever." Oh dear.

"Is she okay?" I asked cautiously.

"Yeah, well, she's has a little too much tonight," He tried to explain. In the background, Ayume continued to babble.

"Did you know that Kagome knew Inuyasha in college? They were best friends! Oh my gosh, he's so hot, you know?"

"I can tell."

"I was wondering if I could take her to your place? Eri's not at their apartment and I don't want to leave her alone," he requested.

"Uh, yeah, sure, I guess. Is there a reason you can't stay with her?"

"We…well, we broke up tonight. And I'm not so much of a jerk to just leave her stranded."

"You broke up?" I questioned. I thought things had been going really well between the two of them. At least, Ayume had no complaints.

"Yeah, it's a long, not very interesting story. Look, can I bring her or not?"

"Yes, of course." I gave him my address. I hung up a moment later and got out of bed. I wrapped a blanket around my shoulders and walked over to the couch. Sitting down with a sigh, I closed my eyes and dozed for a little while, waiting for the tell tale sign of the buzzer to my apartment to let me know when they arrived. It wasn't long before I sleepily was helping Bankotsu get a _very _drunk Ayume up the stairs and onto my couch. Soon after, she quieted down and began to fall asleep. I spared a glance at Bankotsu who was standing awkwardly at my door. "You should probably leave now."

"Yeah, I guess I should. Do you think, uh, that she'll be okay?" I nodded.

"I've seen her in a worse state. She'll have one hell of a hangover in the morning, but she'll be fine."

"Well, then, I guess I'll be going. It was, uh, nice to meet you."

"Hmm," I responded, dismissing him. While I'm sure the break up wasn't entirely his fault, he was _not_ my friend. I felt compelled to stand by her, to treat the man who caused her heartbreak with disdain, even though she was the cause for waking me up at this hour. Looking slightly ashamed of himself, Bankotsu left, quietly shutting the door behind him. I sighed and turned to look at Ayume, who was half awake on my couch. Suddenly, her eyes widened and she bolted upright.

"I'm gonna be sick," she murmured, before she leapt to her feet and ran into my bathroom. At the sound of her retching, I winced. I made my way to the bathroom and found her sitting on the tile floor, hugging the toilet, crying quietly. Mascara was running down her face and her lipstick was smeared after she wiped her mouth with the back of her hand. I sat down on the floor with her and stroked her back comfortingly.

"Shhhh, everything's gonna be okay." She actually sobbed harder at these words and I bit my lip, trying to come up with something to say that wouldn't make it worse. Without warning, Ayume turned toward the toilet and vomited again. I gathered up her hair and held it back for her until she stopped. Settling back onto the tiled bathroom floor, Ayume leaned her head on my shoulder. "Ayume, what happened?" I asked.

The tears began again, but they were slower, less hysterical. They were sad tears, tears mourning the loss of a relationship that could have really been something. I knew a lot about these type of tears.

"Why does she always get everything she wants?" Ayume whispered. "What does she have that I don't. It's not fair! We look exactly the same. We're twins! How come she gets all the hot guys, all the luck. It's not fair! Why isn't it me? Why could I get a guy like Inuyasha Azuma? Why couldn't I get Inuyasha? What's wrong with me?"

"Oh Ayume." I hugged her. There wasn't much more I could do.

Inuyasha Azuma was causing way more problems than I ever imagined he could.

* * *

Ayume never went into the particulars of her disagreement with Bankotsu and I didn't ask, not after my first attempt in the bathroom. I figured she needed some time to process the whole thing. If and when she was ready to talk about it, she would. She had practically moved into my apartment, sleeping on my couch for almost a week. She said she was too embarrassed to go home. She didn't want to have to face her sister in a loving relationship, which she so envied, and tell her that her own was in ruins. I understood and told her she could stay as long as she liked. Besides, I wasn't home much lately; I was hitting the streets and trying to find myself a job of some sort. I wanted to write, sure, but writing wasn't putting any money in my bank account and it was getting dangerously low. I could always borrow some money if I needed to, after all, Miroku and Sango were well off and would do it in a heartbeat. Auntie Kim would do it too, no questions asked, but I the option was a last resort. Something in me just couldn't bring myself to ask for help with this situation.

Friday night arrived with no flourish, no show, nothing out of the ordinary. It was raining when I got out of bed and began to make coffee. Ayume was snoring softly on my couch; she'd be up soon though, once she smelled breakfast. Putting some toast into the toaster, I pulled out the orange juice and milk from the fridge and poured myself a glass. Opening the cabinet, I pulled out my cereal and enjoyed the sound of it dropping into the bowl. Pouring some milk over it, I grabbed a spoon and began to eat, waiting for the toast to pop up and the coffee to finish brewing. A couple moments later, the toast popped up and so did Ayume. I buttered the toast, poured the orange juice into a glass and placed it in front of her.

"Thanks Kagome," she said quietly and ate. The coffee was finally finished and I poured myself a mug and let the caffeine wash over me. We ate in silence before I emptied my bowl of milk and drank down the rest of my coffee.

"I'm headed out, but I'll be back around 4:30 to get ready for dinner tonight. We'll be leaving about 5." Ayume looked at me wide eyed.

" Kagome, I don't—"

"Not another word. If you're going to crash on my couch, you're gonna go to dinner. It's not a big deal. Besides, it'll do you some good, I think. And I'm sure Eri is worried about you," I explained, an expectant look on my face. She pouted.

"Fine, whatever." I smiled brightly at her, even though she was frowning and clearly annoyed with me.

"Good. I'll see you at 4:30 then!" I called out, my right foot already out the door.

* * *

"So, Inuyasha," Sango asked as we all began to serve ourselves, "Do you have any interesting plans this week?" He shrugged.

"I'm headed to the city to visit a friend next weekend," he responded.

"I'm going too!" Eri chimed in, lacing her fingers through the hand he has resting on the table. "And Ayume and Bankotsu as well." Ayume, who was sitting next to me tensed up. I glanced at her and I could see the panic on her face.

"Actually," she got out, her voice frantic, "Bankotsu can't come. He uh, he, um, has a work thing. And can't make it. Yeah, he has to work. Kagome is gonna come instead."

"What?" Inuyasha and I said at the same time, identical looks of shock. Ayume nodded.

"I was going to ask you, but there wasn't time," she explained. "I'm sure you won't mind."

"Uh, Ayume, can I talk to you for a sec?" I nodded my head towards the other room. "Now?" I spared a look at Inuyasha whose face was a mixture of surprise, annoyance, and apprehension. We got up and walked out of the room down the hall towards the bathroom.

"I'm sorry I didn't tell you earlier. I forgot," Ayume beseeched, "But please, please don't make up an excuse to not go. I need you there. Don't let me be the third wheel! I don't think I can stand it." I sighed.

"Can't you just make an excuse to not go too? I don't understand why you have to drag me into it. How long is this trip for anyways?" Ayume shrugged.

"About a week, as far as I can tell. But we can leave after a couple days, I promise," she begged.

"Ayume! I can't just take a couple of days and not job hunt! I need to find something and soon or else I'm going to be evicted for not paying my rent!"

"You could look for a job in the city. You'd probably have more luck there anyways. Please, Kagome, please? As a favor for me? I'll owe you for the rest of time; just do this one thing for me and I'll never ask for anything ever again. I'll even get off your couch and go back to my apartment with Eri. Really, I will." I rubbed the bridge of my nose in exasperation. As much as I wanted to say no, I knew I couldn't. I just wasn't that person.

"Okay," I conceded. Ayume launched herself at me and gave me a bone crushing hug.

"Thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you!"

"You owe me!" I said in what I hoped was an commanding voice. "And don't you forget it!"

* * *

After the awkward moment in dinner where it was announced that I would, in fact, be accompanying the group to the city, everything had gone smoothly. For all his anxiety about it, Inuyasha was surprisingly passive about my confirmation of going. I occasionally glanced at him through the night but he was purposefully ignoring me, his gaze always somewhere else. It irritated me to no end, and I'm not sure why. I didn't particularly want him to be looking at me (okay, a tiny part of me did. A _tiny_ part). He had no reason to, after all. But even in passing, his eyes never wavered in my general direction and were pointedly staring in the opposite direction. Seriously? He couldn't look at me? What would happen if he did? Would the world stop spinning? A bomb would go off? And this is the same man who said he wanted a truce, wanted us to get along civilly, but yet refused to acknowledge my existence. It was frustrating.

As promised, Ayume went home with Eri that night. Rin and Sesshoumaru and Inuyasha had all left over an hour ago. I stayed to spend time with Sango and Miroku. But soon enough, it was getting late and it was time for me to go. I hugged my sister and my friend, bid them goodbye and walked out the door and to the driveway to my car. My keys in hand, I pressed the unlock button and, my hand on the door handle, was about to get in and get on my way when a voice startled me.

"Shh, don't scream. I need to talk to you." I dropped my keys, my heart pounding as I whirled around to see who had sneaked up on me. I frowned when I saw Inuyasha, standing there awkwardly, his hands in his pockets, his face pleading with me to cooperate. I reached down and grabbed my keys in a huff.

"This better be good, Inuyasha. You scared the living daylights out of me."

"Yeah, sorry about that. I was trying to find a way to get your attention without scaring you, but I couldn't think of any." I rolled my eyes.

"Whatever. You want to tell me why you needed to talk to me so badly? It's rather late and I would like to get home."

"I just…well, here's the thing. I think it might be best if you didn't come. I mean, I get that you still have some lingering feelings of hatred towards me, but that's a really shitty reason to go." I laugh bubbled up within me. Seriously?

"Are you kidding me? You think I'm out to sabotage your relationship with Eri? And that's why I want to go on this stupid trip?"

"Well, isn't it?"

"Oh come on. I've got some news for you: I _don't_ want to go on this trip. I really have no desire to spend time with you and your lovely girlfriend and watch you two make out with each other all week. Sorry, it's just not my thing. I'm going because Ayume asked me to and _only_ because she asked me to."

"Why the hell would she ask you?" I stared at him in disbelief.

"Are you that stupid? Ayume and Bankotsu broke up. Understandably, she doesn't want to go alone with the two of you, reminding her of what she's missing out on. The girl's been dumped. She needs some support while she clears her head."

"And she can't find that support from someone else?" I shrugged.

"I'm sure she could. She does have other friends. But she asked me. And I'm not going to say no, just because I know that it's going to make _you_ uncomfortable. And _you_, _you_ need to get over yourself. My world does not revolve around you and finding ways to ruin your life. If anything, I'm trying my best to forget you ever existed. So grow up and stop being such a jerk. Just because we had a relationship years ago doesn't mean you have an inkling about what goes through my head and why I decide to do anything. And just because you're all famous and successful now doesn't mean that you should just expect everyone, _especially me_, to do whatever the hell you want. I like you. You're a good guy, most of the time. But you need to get your head out of your ass and quick. Okay?" I'm not sure where the rant came from, but once I started, I couldn't stop. The words just tumbled out of my mouth. He stood there, dumbstruck at my unloading onto him. I sighed. "Look, I'm tired of fighting with you. The only conversations we've ever had have been battling with each other. I've got other things I need to focus on right now. You're the one that called a truce and I agreed to it. So let's stop being either at each other's throats or completely ignoring each other. Okay?"

"Yeah, okay," he nodded.

"Good. I'm going home now. Goodnight, Inuyasha. I'll see you in a couple days." Without another word, I got in my car and drove off.

* * *

A/N: So I actually finished this last night, sans title. Trying to find one this morning was rather difficult. So I added that last scene (and 2 extra pages) on a whim and finally found one that fit. There may be a November update (at the end, near Thanksgiving), but it really depends on workload. If I can't manage it, then I'll see you all in December!

Hi Claire!

Leave a review on your way out, please :).

Emily

NaP


	8. 7:I'm So Tired

Turn On Me

Chapter 7- I'm So Tired

_You know I can't sleep, I can't stop my brain  
You know it's three weeks, I'm goin' insane  
You know I'd give you everything I've got  
For a little peace of mind_

I'm So Tired by The Beatles

We all got out of the car as soon as we had arrived. Inuyasha and Eri went to the trunk to deal with the luggage while Ayume leaned against the passenger side door. I didn't have time to think before I was swept up and twirled around. "It really is you! Yash said you'd be coming, but I didn't quite believe him."

"Put me down!"I begged, laughing. "God, Kouga, you know how much I hate those!" As soon as my two feet hit the ground, I stepped back and looked at him. Kouga was an old friend of Inuyasha's; they played in a band together in college. We had gotten to know each other quite well during the time that Inuyasha and I dated. I hadn't realized just how much I missed him until now. He looked good. I sighed and hugged him tightly. He wrapped his arms around me just as tight. I was aware of Ayume's questioning gaze on me but I ignored it.

"How's my woman been?" He asked me. I smiled slightly at the nickname. He used to call me his woman because it would piss Inuyasha off.

"Not so great. But I've been getting by. How are you?" He smiled widely at me.

"Things are good. I mean, the bar's doing really well and the band is getting a nice following on the weekends. I honestly couldn't ask for anything more."

"Well I certainly could." My eyes darted quickly to the left where a short red headed woman was standing with her arms crossed over her chest, looking slightly annoyed. "In fact, I could ask for a husband that would introduce me to his friend." I stared, my eyes darting back and forth between the two of them.

"You got married?" I asked excitedly. Kouga nodded, bashfully.

"Yeah, a little over a year ago."

"Oh that's wonderful!" I hugged him again before turning to his wife.

"My name's Kagome. It's nice to meet you." She shook my hand.

"I'm Ayame. I've heard a lot about you. It's nice to put a face to the name." I raised an eyebrow.

"Oh? Just what kind of lies have you been telling her, Kouga?" I asked with a smirk. He winked at me.

"Only the good kind, I assure you." I chuckled.

"Oi! Are you two done flirting? Because I, for one, would like to go inside." Inuyasha's gruff voice butted in. I blushed, slightly embarrassed.

"We weren't flirting," I mumbled, my eyes focused on my shoes.

"Whatever. Can we get inside?" Kouga frowned slightly before shrugging.

"Door's open dude." Ayame sighed at her husband's antics, rolling her eyes.

"I'll show them inside. You suck as a host." Her voice held immense amusement. She walked up to the door and opened it, welcoming the guests inside. Without another word, Inuyasha walked up the porch stairs and entered the building, Eri following closely behind him. Ayume mounted the stairs slowly, taking her time and loitering by the door, obviously interested in seeing what Kouga and I would say next. She waved Ayame off, letting her know that she'd be inside in a second. Kouga, his back to the door, missed all of this.

"He's an ass," Kouga stated, matter-of-factly. I shrugged.

"He has good reason." Kouga scoffed at that.

"He needs to get the hell over the past."

"Look," I said, my voice placating, "I really don't want to discuss this right now, on the street, where anyone could hear." I gave Ayume a pointed look over Kouga's shoulder. She blushed, rightfully embarrassed and hurried inside. I sighed and rolled my eyes. "We'll discuss it later, okay?" He sighed.

"If that's what you want. You want to get inside?" I nodded.

"That'd be nice. And on the way up, you can tell me how things have been with the band."

"Eh, there's not much to tell," he started, opening the door for me. "Inuyasha stuck around for a little while, but then left to do his own thing. That's fine. We all knew that he'd leave one day. He's serious about this stuff, where as it's just a hobby for us. Ayame came in a couple years ago and replaced him as our lead singer. I play the guitar. Ginta's still on bass and we added a new kid on keyboard. His name's Hojou. He's actually staying with Ayame and me for a bit. He and his ex just broke it off. Really messy; kicked him out. So he's crashing with us until he gets enough money to find a place of his own. Hakaku's still our glorified roadie, but we all know we couldn't do a show without him." I smiled, most of the names familiar to me from back when I was dating Inuyasha.

"So Ayame, besides being your wife and lead singer, what does she do?" Kouga laughed.

"Oh man, you're not gonna believe this. She's an accountant for a large company, actually." I laughed.

"You fell for a suit?" I asked him, an amused smile on my face. "Weren't you the one who told me, all those years ago, that you'd never in a million years date a corporate monkey? Told me you had to do your part to stick it to the man, hm?"

"Yeah, well, I'm pretty sure I was drunk when I said that, so it doesn't really count." We both laughed as we reached the door to the apartment.

"I've got to say, Kouga, it's good to see you. You make me glad that I was dragged out on this trip." Kouga didn't say anything at first, his face slightly troubled. He opened the door and let me in before speaking again.

"Let me show you to your room." I raised my eyebrows at his behavior. Not thirty seconds before we had been joking around, but now that we were inside, he was stiff. Out of the corner of my eye, I noticed Inuyasha sitting on the couch, guitar in hand, fiddling with the strings. With a sigh, I followed Kouga down the hall to the guest bedroom where I would be staying with Ayume and Eri. We didn't say another word to each other and after I put my stuff down, Kouga exited. I rolled my eyes after he left. Things were only just beginning to get awkward.

* * *

An hour or so later, I exited the room. I kept my head down, lost in thought; I wasn't watching where I was going. A second later, I lightly bumped into someone, jarring me out of my head. "Oh!" was all I could think of the mutter. The bashful boy in front of me smiled.

"It's fine. No harm done."

"I…I…I don't think we've met. I'm Kagome." I stuck out my hand to shake.

"Nice to meet you. I'm Hojou." I smiled at him as I took him in. He was slightly taller than me, but still rather short and thin. His dark brown hair hung shaggily over his face.

"So you're Kouga's new band member, huh?" He shrugged.

"Eh, I've been around about two years now, I wouldn't exactly say that I'm new." I nodded.

"True. But you're new to me. It's been about four years since I've seen Kouga and his band, and you definitely weren't around back then."

"I almost wish I was, then I'd know this pretty woman in front of me." I thought I was done with the whole schoolgirl blushing thing, when a boy compliments you, but apparently I'm not. My face lit up like a Christmas tree.

"That's nice of you to say." He shrugged.

"It's true. I'll see you around, Kagome. I gotta head out to work." And just like that, he took off down the hall, leaving me behind to stare at where he was a moment before. I laughed lightly, suddenly, a smile pulling itself into place on my face.

* * *

"_So is there a particular reason I'm not allowed to see where I'm going?" I murmured, irritated, as I was being led along a path to somewhere, blindfolded. Inuyasha had called me earlier telling to be ready to go in an hour, no more details. I tried as hard as I could to get something out of him but he refused. He told me nothing else only that it was "a surprise, wench."Annoyed that he wouldn't tell me, but too curious to consider not going, I checked my makeup, put on a nicer shirt, as I had been wearing my ratty college sweatshirt, and put on a skirt. It was just starting to get warm enough for it. When he arrived he immediately produced a black blindfold and begrudgingly, I allowed him to cover my eyes. We had been walking a while now and I was getting tired of this._

"_Keh, be patient. We're almost there." I frowned._

"_You said that ten minutes ago." I pointed out._

"_Jeez, woman, if I knew you were going to carry on like this, I wouldn't have bothered." I sighed._

"_I get that you're trying to be cute and romantic and all that, but you know I hate surprises. Can't I just take the stupid blindfold off?" I begged. He grunted._

"_I honestly don't know why I try. Go ahead. Do whatever the hell you want." I winced and sighed._

"_Fine, I'll keep the damn thing on. But it better be worth it, Inuyasha! My thesis is due in two days and I've still got three pages to go. And then I've got to edit, because these last ten pages are crap! And I've got my last exam tomorrow, so if we could hurry this whole surprise, that I do not need, up, I'd appreciate it."_

"_We're here." We had stopped abruptly. "You can take the blindfold off now." I reached back to untie the not, but hesitated. Fear and anticipation filled me. What if I didn't want to see what the view was, unobstructed? What if I was perfectly happy being in the dark? What if I didn't want things to change? Deep down I knew that the minute I untied this blindfold, things were about to change. "Oi! I ain't got all day, wench. Besides, weren't you the one who was in a hurry?" Without another word, I pulled the knot undone and the blindfold fell down to the floor. It took a couple seconds for my eyes to adjust to the light, but the minute they did, I wished for the blindfold to be put back on._

"_Oh no. No!" I cried, willing silently for this all to be some sort of mistake. We were in the library, on the balcony and somehow, all the tables below had been pushed together. No one was studying on them, although books were on them. The books were arranged on the tables, spelling out Marry Me? in big, recognizable letters. "Oh no." I turned, distressed to look at Inuyasha who was standing beside me. "What are you doing, you idiot?" I screeched. He rolled his eyes._

"_I thought it was obvious," he bit out, frowning at me._

"_But…why? What the hell are you thinking?" Thoughts were running through my head a mile a minute, too quickly for me to truly analyze what was going on._

"_I'm thinking that I love you and I want to spend the rest of my life with you. Is that so hard to believe?"_

"_Yes!" I yelled, my voice frantic. "Yes, it's ridiculous and impulsive and it's moving too fast and we're both so young and I mean, I just…sometimes love isn't enough." He scoffed._

"_Don't you get it? Love is everything! Yeah, it'll be tough. I know that. But there's nowhere else I'd rather be. God, why can't you just see what the rest of the world sees? Why can't you see what I see? Why don't you want to marry me? I want a legitimate reason, not this 'it's too fast' bullshit."_

"_I…I can't give you one!"_

"_Then marry me!"_

"_No!" He rolled his eyes._

"_God, Kagome, why does everything have to be an argument with you!? You said it yourself, you can't think of an argument other than the fact that it'd be too hard. And that's not an excuse. When have you ever decided not to do something because it's too hard? Never! You're not like that. You persevere, even when you don't think you'll make it, because you have to try. You have to try, Kagome, because then we'll never know. And that's worse than failing."_

"_You're right," I whispered, tears filling my eyes. "You're always right. Okay then. Okay." He perked up instantly._

"_Okay? Is that a yes?" I nodded before deciding that I needed to voice it. Saying it out loud made it final._

"_Yes, I'll marry you." His lips crashed on mine, his hands grabbing mine, and the tears building in my eyes fell. And as he slipped the ring on my finger and I literally felt the weight of the decision I just made, I chose to believe I was crying from joy._

* * *

I stumbled into the kitchen early the next morning, craving a cup of coffee to wake me up. I had been tossing and turning the whole night, sleep evading my grasp. If I was going to even attempt to get through this day, I would need some caffeine in my system. Setting the coffee pot on, I had nothing to do but wait, so I moved into the living room to sit. To my surprise, it was already occupied. Inuyasha sat on the couch, strumming his guitar lightly; it finally registered in my tired brain that there was quiet music in the apartment. He didn't notice me, lost in his music, his head bent, eyes guarded, as he plucked the strings of his guitar, humming softly along. I slowly tried to back out of the room but, as usual, my plan failed. I walked right into the wall, making a huge 'thunk' and an "ow" escaped my lips. The music stopped and Inuyasha looked up at me, his eyes piercing me. I rubbed the spot on my forehead that had collided with the wall, a slight hiss exiting my lips.

"You okay?" He questioned. I was slightly surprised by his concern, considering the way things had been between us lately. I nodded.

"Yeah, I'll be fine. I don't think it'll bruise. Just another reason for why I shouldn't function in the morning without coffee." He shrugged.

"You never were a morning person." I giggled.

"That is true. God, do you remember that time that you tried to surprise me with breakfast in bed and I wound up punching you in the face, accidently?" He laughed at the memory, a big whooping laugh I never thought I'd hear again, let alone cause.

"Oh man. I had completely forgotten about that. Man, you were a right nightmare to wake up back in college." I smiled.

"I know right." Promptly I yawned. "Oh, I hope the coffee is ready soon. Takes too damn long to make the stuff."

"You okay?" He questioned me again.

"I'm fine. Just tired. Didn't sleep well. My brain wouldn't shut off last night. Too much on my mind, you know?"

"Yeah, I know. What was keeping you up this time, if you don't mind me asking?" I shot him a curious look, hesitating in my answer. His attitude, his behavior had done a complete 180 since I last spoke to him. I was skeptical about how long it would last before we were at each other's throats. If I let him know what really was keeping me up, how would he react? "You don't have to tell me."

"No it's okay," I wasn't sure what I was doing. Did I really want to tell him? The words were out of my mouth before I could analyze the situation another second. "I was thinking about us." Immediately, he soured and internally, I beat myself up. Stupid, stupid girl! What were you thinking.

"There is no us." His response was bitter, but a second later regret flashed across his face. "I'm sorry. That was uncalled for." My eyebrows shot up. An apology? From Inuyasha?

"Who are you and what have you done with the Inuyasha I know?" I asked lightly, although, really, I wanted an answer. He shrugged.

"Nothing. It's still me. I've just…I've been thinking lately. About what you said the other night. You were right. And I'm trying to make an effort to be less of an ass about things. The past is the past. There's no reason we can't move forward, right?"

"Right." My response was quiet, unsure. He didn't seem to notice.

"So you were thinking about us?" I nodded.

"About when you proposed," I confirmed. His eyes darkened slightly, but his face remained impassive, expressionless, like he was unaffected by the news. It unsettled me. I never thought I would crave his irrational, angry reactions.

"What about it?" He asked me gruffly, his eyes looking at the wall directly behind me; he was avoiding looking me in the eye.

"Just…just about how complicated things were. I regret every day breaking it off with you; you were right. I was scared and after graduation, when I should have felt free, all I could feel was trapped, stretched in nine different directions. It was just too much. I couldn't handle it. There are many times that I think of what life would be like if I had stuck it out, if I had been a more courageous person, and that's what was keeping me up last night," I concluded at last, finally voicing thoughts that had been in my head for so long but that I could never tell anyone before. He didn't react at first, but I could see that he was processing the information that I had just handed to him. He opened his mouth to respond and a jolt of fear coursed through me as I awaited his response.

"I—"

"Inu!" Eri's voice cut him off. His mouth shut with a click and his head turned down the hallway. "Where'd you go?" She stumbled into the living room, dressed in an overly large t-shirt and her hair was slightly mussed up. She smiled immediately upon seeing Inuyasha. "There you are baby." She went over to him and pressed her lips to his and he returned the kiss whole heatedly. Feeling slightly awkward and out of place, I exited and went back into the kitchen, hoping that the coffee was finished brewing.

* * *

A/N: Sorry for no Thanksgiving update guys. My November was pretty much hell. Anyways, I'm now home from school for the next month, so my goal is to get out a couple more updates while I'm free from the chains of higher education. Be sure to leave a review on the way out! Thanks for reading.

Emily

NaP

ONE LAST QUICK NOTE: Over break, I'm going to be going through my stories and cleaning them out. A lot of them are quite old and I don't feel proud of them. Just thought I'd let you all know, because other than _The Crane Wife_ (which has its own issues that need to be addressed), there will be no other notice.


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